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What should I do in this situation?

My fiance and I have a 2 month old daughter together. I work full time and he works part time for right now plus he's going back to school. My mom takes care of the baby in the morning while he's at work. we'll my mom works 3pm - 11pm everyday for the next two weeks (she's got laid off from her full time job, but has a part time job). My fiance wants to let some of his family members take care of the baby a couple of days when my parents and him and I wont be home. But I really don't want to let his grandparents watch her because his grandpa sexually abused his mom when she was younger. And I don't want to let his mom because his step dad was violent to him and still hates him and treats him like crap and I don't want him to take it out on the baby. I've told him all this before but he thinks she'll be okay and it wont happen. Any suggestions?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:18 PM on Jul. 6, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (4)
  • So you're going to marry this man and you don't trust or believe what he says or does?


    Answer by Anonymous at 12:24 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • Eeeek..sticky situation.Follow your motherly instincts, you'll know what to do. I always go with my gut feeling when it comes to leaving my children with anyone...I may be wrong but I wouldn't want to be proven right.

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 12:25 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • I trust my fiance, I don't trust his family.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:26 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • If you feel that strongly about leaving your child with his family, I feel pretty strongly that you shouldn't. Given what you know about the abuse that occurred, I certainly wouldn't leave my child with them. Keep in mind that a 2 month old has no control over anything, and crying is her only way of communication. My husband comes from a screwed-up line of family too (although the physical abusers are not around anymore) and I know the patience level can be short. I get that you trust your fiance - my husband made clear to me that we would raise our child differently and we are on the same page about his family members and who gets to spend how much time with our baby. You and your fiance need to be on the same page about his family, otherwise its a problem that's only going to get worse.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:21 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

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