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child services

For the third time in six months my sd came over with bruises saying her mother did it to her. We have been given temp. custody everytime. Why do they keep sending her back? What else can we do?

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Asked by Anonymous at 4:00 PM on Jul. 6, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (12)
  • get an attorney and call CASA, CASSA is a child advocacy group that helps kids when mthe adulkts cant seem to get it together. I realize thats not the case here, but they should still at the very least have some input for you.
    Keep fighting for her. and another option is to have people you trust call children and fam services when she goes to mom. Eventually they will either be in her face so much she will stop hurting her, or the agency will finally make a better decsion for the child.

    Answer by Bearsjen at 4:04 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • Get temporary custody again but this time get a lawyer as well and fight like hell for full custody.

    Answer by 2murphyboys at 4:05 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • First, of all ,this is another case trying to make the mom look bad,second how old is the child,third,when you questioned her,how did you put your questions,the way and how you questioned her makes a great difference,I have 2 grands in daycare, my granddaughter came home with scratches,when we questioned her,my DD asked her ,"did Marcus hit you again,of course my granddaughter,said yes",now when I waited for a few hours ,"I asked her,what did you do to that pretty face",she said I felled down,she is 2,my granddaughter is rough,she has scratches,she falls,we can be seating right there and she will run and fall. I am thinking,this is why the courts are returning the child to her mother,bruises from abuse and scrapes and marks from kids and playing look different. Whats going to happen,the courts are going to start watching you,they know your SD isn't being abused.You got the woman husband,now you want her child.Back off.


    Answer by Anonymous at 4:43 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • First off the is six years old. Which is old enough to differentiate between whos hitting and whos. Secondly, if you heard the child crying how she is scared then you would have a different outlook, Lastly, there is no need to attack me for asking for advice on how to proceed. Thank you to the others for trying to help me. This is a very stressful time.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:08 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • my answer would be why dont you want her...i think she is going to pick up on the fact that you keep sending her back or someone just doesnt want her???maybe im wrong?i know its none of business to say but why dont you just keep her for a while.if she is 6 you can best believe she is going to pick up on the fact that someone doesnt want her?

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:35 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • anona 5:53, b/c i you are only given temp. custody the courts say you HAVE TO give her back, or go on the run for the rest of your life.
    Poster, I'd go ahead and call CS again and I'd contact agencies like CASAS etc. I'd also file for full custody with parenting classes, anger management classes and SUPERVISED visitation only.
    I'd really look into getting an atty. if possible. a get around is to do LOTS of research, have lists of questions and try to get some of those pre-consultation (free) things to answer missing points.
    When you get temp, this time, try for FULL.
    At this point the courts are endangering the childs health and well being. Play it nice, see if the CPS workers are on your side they may also have some advice on how to go about it.
    When you go to court demand a GAL for the child, also demad home studies etc.
    That's all I can think of off the top of my head, good luck

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 5:44 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • We wanted to keep her but children services wont back us up. My DD would b found in contempt of Court if he didnt give her back. Believe me it kills him to drop her off. It breaks my heart everyday thinking about her there.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:46 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • Children services has said the best we could get is split physical custody.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:51 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • If anyone can add anything else it would be very helpful.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:23 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • You can hire an attorney to represent your husband. Other wise the state will do what it perceives is the best interest of the child. Your husband can take his ex back to family court and seek soul parental custody. Without an attorney there is not much that can be done. It has to be played out in family court just like any other custody case. CPS does not determine custody.....a family court judge does. You can go to the superviser and express your concerns, then that person's supervisor and go all the way up to the state oversite of social services. But in the long run, as expensive as it is, the only way to have an equal and fair say is to hire a lawyer.

    Answer by frogdawg at 7:11 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

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