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Why do people spend thousands on weddings?

I just don't get it especially since the divorce rate in America is so high. I may be alone in this, but why does the average couple spend so much money on a lavish wedding? Almost every person I have graduated with a couple years ago has been married. They all have these huge weddings. I also know about half whose gotten or going through a divorce. Why? Does money really make a difference? An expensive dress and a 5 tiered cake will not make your marriage a good one.

We didn't have a wedding. Didn't want one.
Let me clear another thing, we are a middle class family and could have afforded a lavish wedding. In fact, our parents wanted us to have a big wedding. We didn't. All we wanted was eachother.

There is nothing wrong with weddings. I would just like to know the point of going in debt because of a ceremony to someone who you will likely be divorcing soon!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:48 PM on Jul. 7, 2009 in Just for Fun

This question is closed.
Answers (44)
  • I think people have huge weddings for 2 reasons: 1) because they want to keep up with the Jones, smiths or whatever neighbor just had a huge shindig and 2) because they think more about the wedding than the marriage. I had a big wedding but not huge. I don't even remember how much it cost my mom, I would guess around $15-20K, at this point it averages $1000-1500 a year. We did what we did partly because we wanted to celebrate with our families, most of whom live 2000-10,000 miles away. But DH and I planned it together and chose things together. No one was bride or groom-zilla. The only hissy fit was my mom on the date we originally chose. We moved it. Oh well. It was the marriage that was important to us and still is - 15 yrs at the end of the month.
    balagan_imma

    Answer by balagan_imma at 4:36 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • We spent about 7 thousand on our wedding and it was far from "lavish".
    But unless i murder his son or he starts beating us without willingness to change, we will never get divorced.
    That's right. We dont believe in divorce unless it is the only option.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:51 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • I think because America is so greedy and materialistic. Everything revolves around money. We *have* to have the latest cars, biggest tvs, expensive shoes. Even our pets (excluding show pets with a pedigree) cost hundreds and even thousands. It makes no sense to me either why someone would pay $1200 for a mutt when you can get a pet for a way better value and for less. Or why the woman down the street buys hundreds of shoes, but doesn't wear them.

    Family values in America has gone to shit.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:52 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • oustanding love, thats cool. You are supposed to be together through thick and thin. ALot of ppl take marraige lightly.They are focused more on the details of their wedding instead of actual marraige and commitment.
    babycakes254

    Answer by babycakes254 at 1:54 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • I think weddings are a waste of time. Its a big party. Has nothing to do with the marriage AT ALL!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:55 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • Ours was about 5,000 with the biggest cost being our food and hall. My dress was only 500.00 and I have it preserved. People can spend that kind of money if they want and can afford it. I see no problem with it. It is after all only a once in a lifetime event. Supposed to be anyway and that's what my husband and I will do. People don't go into marriage expecting divorce.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:57 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • My wedding cost right about $3,000, this was 11 years ago. I made most everything myself. I think it is insane to spend thousands on a wedding. I personally would want the money for a house or something. Some people just want to show people how much money they have, even if they don't have money. They want people to think they do. I watch that show "Platnium Weddings" on We and sometimes I cannot believe what people spend. That being said though I want to be a wedding planner, so hopefully I will get some stupid clients that spend thousands of dollars. That way I can charge a percentage of the total cost of the wedding and make some money. LOL. Whay is completely worse is that show "My super Sweet 16" on MTV. Spending that amount of money on a 16th b-day party??? Give me a break. Those parents deserve the brats they have, and they also deserve to be smacked sideways.
    TeriMelisa

    Answer by TeriMelisa at 1:58 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • Cynical. No family values in America hasn't gone to shit. Just your perspective of family values in America. We don't have the latest cars, biggests tvs, most expensive shoes and my pet of 12 years was a stray.

    DH and I did spend close to $20,000 on our wedding and took a year to plan. Why? Because we wanted to. We had a wonderful wedding, beautiful short service, babysitters for the couples that brought kids, 6 course meal, open bar, dj, and our wedding wasn't 5 tiers. It was 3. The bottom tier was white cake (mine) and the 2nd and 3rd tiers were DH's since he loves chocolate. Each guest got to take turns in the photo booth we had brought in so they could have a picture to take home and each place setting had 3 favors each. We went all out and it was worth the money. Divorce is not an option for us.

    I think those that complain about lavish weddings are jealous. And our wedding was paid off before the wedding.
    lilbit022009

    Answer by lilbit022009 at 2:00 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • My wedding dress nearly thirty years ago cost 150.00 dollars and it was lacey looking which was fair more important to me than real lace. I bought it through jcpenney catalog. I had a borrowed crown and new veil. My parents gave me and hubby choice of huge wedding and little cash gift or larger cash gift and smaller wedding.

    We had less than 100 people in my church hall and my parents gifted us with their hard earned saved money of $2,000.00 which was left after expenses all. They worked very very hard and we were and are honored that they paid for our wedding. My inlaws paid for our rehearsal meal at my parents house after the rehearsal. We had a great time at our wedding. If our daughters get married we will set a limit too and offer same and if our son gets married we will offer to split to a specific dollar costs of wedding and/or pay to specific cost rehearsal meal.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:25 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • Were getting married May next year. MY fiance want's a big wedding...I do not. I don't see how all of our family, friend, & people we barley know watching us exchange I DO's is supposed to make our love mean more. I'm for having a small church wedding since he wants it. But I'd be just as happy getting married at the courthouse. To each their own. One of the funniest wedding stories I've heard, this girl I work with lives in a trailer park. Themselves & their parents spent $100K on a wedding!!!! OMG!!! Now that's insane. It was beautiful, her dress was expensive & beautiful. Honestly, though, I would have wanted the $ to buy a house or something, not spend on one day of my life!!!! LOL
    jfblaine

    Answer by jfblaine at 2:26 PM on Jul. 7, 2009