Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Would you split the bills with DH ??

My husband was laid off for 5 months. I have a full time job that pays decent so it wasn't the end of the world when he wasn't working, we just had to keep a closer eye on where our money was going. Now he is working making good money and we are coming closer to going in the hole by the time pay day comes around with TWO incomes!!! I have seen that the more money WE make the more HE wants to spend. I saw how well we could save on my check alone and now he wants to blow his pay check on crap. He makes enough money that with our incomes combined we could save for a down payment on a home we want, one day he wants a boat (that would be nice)my car has 210k miles on it, so I am looking for a car, but he wants to go,go,go! I have told him if he can't contribute to the bills, we will split the bills, then I am afraid, he won't pay his part and the power or something will get cutt off. What do I do??

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:18 PM on Jul. 7, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • My friend and her husband have ajoint account. On pay day each couple puts in the designated amount to cover the bills and she pays the bills out of the joint account. It works very well for them. They each have an account that they use to save for their own wants, but all household bills are taken from the joint account. They put in a percentage of what they earn so it is fair. This would require you to make a budget and include everything like groceries and savings. Take 80 to 90% of each of your pay and see if it will cover all bills and so much for joint savings (neither can touch joint savings..it is for ememrgency or house...) Then put the remaining 10 to 15% in your own debit account for your fun money to spend or save as you choose.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 5:23 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • I do the finances in our house. I put my entire check in our account and DH puts all but enough to buy himself lunches, etc. I pay the bills out of that pot, and I also use that pot for my own spending....but we don't spend really. Grocery shopping and the bills are the first priority. Do you have a joint account?
    gramsmom

    Answer by gramsmom at 5:26 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • Maybe here is a better idea, set a certain amount of money out of each check and both of you put into an account for the bills and that way you can still make sure that the bills are paid. Have him put a little more that way you can save some too. Then the rest is for spending. My fiance and I both have a $250 spending limit each week and the rest goes into the checking account.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:29 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • Sit him down and show him your finances. Tell him everything you just told us. Explain to him that while spending money on crap is great now, wouldn't he like to buy a house? or a boat? Talk to him about saving for those things...

    Give him an "allowance" per week/two weeks/month/whatever that is a good compromise. Where you will still be able to save some, but he will also get to spend some. And you are not allowed to say a word about what he spends it on (as long as it's not hurting anyone or your marriage). If you need to, open him up his own account that you can transfer his allowance into.

    My husband has a spending problem, and he knows it, so this is what we did. It works great for us.
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 5:37 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • Get in touch with a financial planner and make a budget. Include savings, bills and "fun money" so he doesn't feel deprived.

    What's going on is he's having the "I'm working again!" crisis. It's pretty common. Sort of like a starving person who's presented with food...they overeat and make themselves sick!
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 5:39 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • Buy him the book Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey!
    sunnymom3

    Answer by sunnymom3 at 5:39 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • I'll be thinking about these answers, I just wanted to thank you for asking the question.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:11 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • I would either do what the first poster said or make him pay for things HE doesn't want to lose. For example, in our house, I'd make my dh pay for the internet connection, satellite TV, and electricity. He can't do all the stuff HE wants to do without those things. If they got cut off, I would last longer than dh without them. I'd be mad about the electric, but you'd better believe he'd have it back on in less than 24 hours.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:14 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.