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Why wont he take up for them

how can a man who calls himself a daddy let this happen without saying anything. My kids got on his facebook and read a conversation from him and his soon to be ex wife and one thing it said was 'MY EX HUSBAND IS BEING A BITCH TODAY I GUESS HE GOT IT FROM HIS AND HIS KIDS' then in a another part they was talking and she said to him 'I PUT UP WITH THEM BITCHES FOR FIVE YEARS" She says they are the reason for the divorce but he says she was cheating on him but he didnt say anything to her about calling his kids names. On top of all this, his niece that he hasnt talked to in a while wrote a nasty email to my 12 year old saying it is their (my girls) fault for the divorce and she dont see why they want to live with me and my husband because stepmom treats them better. I see the disapointment on their face when they read this junk. He wont be a man and take up for his kids and it makes me so mad

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:08 PM on Jul. 7, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Men tend not to know how to handle situations like this especially since everyone involved is female. I think you are going to have to take the ball on this one with the girls and help guide him through it. Don't chastize him, help him. He is probably clueless as to how to handle it.

    Answer by cat1622 at 10:20 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • He also may just be disregarding anything he thinks is ridiculous, baseless or out of line. It isn't true, in his opinion, so why argue about it? This is a great time to strengthen a few life truths. Like, when you have a difference of opinion with someone, stick to the facts regardless of how low they "punch". Arguing with stupid people just pulls you to their level. Then I would advise them to stay away from his page for awhile (until things are final). Parents do deserve some privacy and he's probably not realizing that they have access to it. Or if he does, I would remind him that they have been reading it and that he needs to spend some time (in person, on the phone, etc.) reassuring them that it wasn't their fault and he doesn't think like that.

    Answer by Lesli at 10:35 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • It's not always wise to argue with people who are upset. Maybe he feels it's better to just ignore the lady. Since it's in writing for all to see. He could at least say that he doesn't appreiciate the rude comments and then ignore her so that it will look like he has done something.

    Answer by SylviaNCali at 10:40 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • op here...hes never taken up for them even when she would leave marks on them by hitting them or cussing them. I thought it was because he was scared of her or something but now that they are getting a divorce I thought he would man up but I guess not

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:45 PM on Jul. 7, 2009

  • I'm confused. What do you mean when you say, he's never "taken up for them"? Am I reading this correctly? What does that mean and who are you referring to? Your boyfriend? He left his computer on, with his facebook account open and your daughters read it? Why weren't you monitoring what they were reading? Who cares what his ex says. Of course she's going to say mean, nasty things. You need to explain to your kids that wasn't their business. And did you say his ex-wife left marks on your kids??? and HE didn't do anything?? Why the hell didn't YOU do something? You should have been on the phone with CPS and the police. You need to re-examine how your handling things, not him.

    Answer by CoolGirlChris at 12:05 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I think u can go beat that bitch's ass, wear a black mask and gloves..i won't tell

    Answer by mumma28 at 12:13 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • My husband's ex caused us alot of problems the first 7 years that we were married. My husband let her get away with saying and doing stupid things, and i got mad at him for it. I think that he thought he was being the bigger person by not fighting with her, and he ignored everything. Sometimes i got mad at him for this, because i thought he should have defended me and him. he is definately paying for it now, because he didn't do anything about the drama in the past, his kids did not get any better., Now they don't even have anything to do with him and they rarely ever call him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:42 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • CoolGirlChris....OP here.... I am talking about my ex husband not my boyfriend. He gave the kids his password to download pictures for him because he is an over the road driver and I was monitoring it thats how I found out and CPS and the cops both were involved when she left marks so you dont know as much as you think you do coming on here with your snotty little attitude and cant even read the post right

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:59 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • take the kids and run that so called dad is such a lame trudst that tell him i said so oh man my sister is going through the same nonsense how fustrating is that....

    Answer by BriannaBopp at 1:15 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • I wont tell either go kick that ungrateful beotch i wont tell either or be a lady and just forget them and do something really sexy to make that "dad" want want... hmmm doesn't make sense huh

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:17 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

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