Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

how do i get my daugter to bed..

im a single mom an i have a 7 months old i believe in attachment parenting, i also breastfeed
im trying to get her to bed with out her sleeping in my bed. i love having her in my bed. but im to tired to lay there an feed her till she gos to bed than now when i get up she wakes back up. its braking my heart to let her cry in her crib but im so tired.. any 1 have any good tips ?

Answer Question

Asked by redivy at 1:07 AM on Jul. 8, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 5 (73 Credits)
Answers (18)
  • i would say feed her a really good dinner bathe, Nurse while reading books you know have a nightly routine and then give her a water bottle to sleep with turn on a moving night light or i let my kids watch a 20 minutes worth of little people a fisher price cartoon i love the timer botton on my remote anyways just let her go to sleep key is to make sure she's full and has played suficiently i think, good luck

    Answer by mirit.rose at 1:17 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • wanted to add that 7 mo is still very young for routine but i held and nursed mine till 6.5 mo and then they had there cribs and lights were out by 8 pm also i wanted to say sooting music that you put on every evening is soothing, you'll find what works

    Answer by mirit.rose at 1:19 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • You can feed her to sleep while you sleep. Crying in her crib won't make more sleep for anyone.

    Answer by jus1jess at 2:04 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I found with my baby that not associating feeding with sleep helps a lot-making feeding the very beginning of the bedtime routine helps them sleep without food.
    I know you said it's hard to hear your baby cry- I agree with you all the way! BUT I ended up letting my baby "cry it out" (only 10 min. at a time, then went in and comforted her, 10 more, etc, until she went to sleep)... after 2 or 3 days of this (a few times a day) she became an awesome sleeper, and quit sleeping in my bed after 4 mos. I felt bad at first until a good friend of mine, and my sister in law, reminded me that this is much more painful for the parent than for the child. It doesn't hurt them at all. I am also a single mother of a 5 month old, and have learned how valuable a good nights sleep is, as parenting can be stressful at times.
    Good luck with getting your little one to sleep, hang in there, these moments go by way too quickly : )

    Answer by Kylies_mommy72 at 2:07 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Also, I found that my baby sleeps a lot better in a bassinet than a crib- I believe the crib was too big and overwhelming, whereas the bassinet was more cozy.
    I also wanted to add that having them "cry it out", if you decide to try that, works best if you do it in the daytime, during naps, so that you aren't trying to do it when you are both exhausted at the end of the day. The same thing with sleeping in your bed- start by having her sleep in her crib for naps.

    Answer by Kylies_mommy72 at 2:16 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • If it didn't hurt them, they wouldn't be crying. Psychological studies are proving more and more that using cry it out is very harmful to the child in many ways in the long and short run. Please, don't do that to your baby. Sleep deprivation comes with parenting.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:18 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Anonymous:
    I guess I've never heard of the results of the psychological studies... my information comes from someone who majored in Child Development... My niece was raised this way and is a very healthy girl, physically and emotionally...If i thought it was hurting my baby I wouldn't do it... Just out of curiosity, where did you read about these studies?

    Answer by Kylies_mommy72 at 2:45 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I dreaded doing the "crib thing" also. My son is seven months old and has officially been sleeping in his crib and out of my bed since 5 months. Even at 5 months I would still put him in bed with me when he woke up at 4 am to nurse... But what I did was establish a routine, and I put him to bed at the same time every night - before I wanted to go to bed. That gave him time to settle down before I was worn out, that way I wouldn't be tempted to just let him sleep him me.

    I also broke a "cardinal rule" and I let him have a toy in his crib when I first lay him down after our night time routine. Many mothers are against it, but it helps him calm down rather than throwing the anxiety of "I'm alone in my crib!" on him immediately. Then after he is asleep, I come in the room, turn on the night light, and remove the toy. No harm, no foul!

    Good luck!

    Answer by vdecker at 3:37 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • To anonymous: please post a link to these studies! I am very interested to learn more about it... Maybe the big "link" in those studies is that the parents of the children who have gone on to have issues are only letting their kids "cry out" because they are lazy and don't care. The difference between those parents and the parents who let their kids cry themselves to sleep is that the parents who care check on their kids every ten minutes or so, reassure them that they are still there, check that all of their needs are fulfilled, and comfort them if they continue to cry for an overwhelming amount of time... Letting a child learn to self soothe is VERY important, and crying is an important part of being a baby... Rushing to pick your child up anytime he/she cries is FAR more damaging than letting your child cry when you know that you have done everything else to make sure that they are warm, dry, fed, etc.


    Answer by vdecker at 3:41 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Oh and as far as the bassinet suggestion: I agree - very helpful with newborns. But the question asked was in reference to a seven month old, and a bassinett is far too dangerous to put a rolling, moving, active 7 month old in, so it probably isn't the best idea. Perhaps a smaller crib that still has high enough sides to keep baby safe?

    Answer by vdecker at 3:44 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.