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What do you think I should do about this...?

I would like to take a road trip with my kids to go visit my parents but since my mom and my dh don't care for eachother, he will not go.
My question is he does not like the idea of me wanting to go alone with the kids (it will be a 10 hr. drive) It kind of makes me think twice though only bc of what you hear and see on tv. I'd hate to be in a big predicament and can't get out so I just better stay put, even though I still want to go. I haven't been over there in 8 yrs. :(
But yet his daughter is going on a road trip 5 hrs. away with some friends and he has no say so bc bm already said she could go (with some friends) He doesn't like the idea but what can you do when your kids don't live with you. I know two different situations but the same feeling for him atleast. What to do? Thanks Ladies.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:00 AM on Jul. 8, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • These are your parents. He can either suck it up and act like a big boy and go, or not. Are you supposed to cut yourself and your children off from your family because of selfishness and fear? I'm sure you've driven before. I'm sure you can handle yourself. What can happen to you elsewhere that cannot happen in your own town? Most accidents happen within a few miles of home. Most murders are done by people you know. So really, you're safer : ). I've taken many, many, many long drives, including with just my young daughter and they were uneventful. The biggest problems are being aware of being tired (but I have done 15-20 hour trips straight through) and finding a motel that isn't gross if you need an overnight. Eight hours is a workday... I'm sure he is genuinely concerned, but...
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 9:09 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Well your dh has to realize these are your parents and you can see them if you want. He can either put on his big boy panties and go with you, or he can accept the fact you are going without him. Since it is a long trip, you may want to break it down maybe drive 5 hours and then stop for the night at a motel. You could look online for things in that area, hotels and such. I think that would give the kids a bit of fun, and a chance to run off some energy after being cooped up in a car. If you do drive straight thru-- I good idea is to stop every 2-3 hours for stretching and potty breaks.
    I hope you have a great trip!!
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 9:23 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Wow, 10 hours is nothing!

    The worst one I've ever done by myself was about 19 hours with my 5 month old DD from Colorado to Texas to see my in-laws. We took two days to do that. Oh and my DD had an ear infection and cried all night in the hotel that we stopped at. :)

    I also drove 12 hours with my 2 week old by myself with no problems.

    I'm driving about 13 with two kids by myself in September so I can go to my class reunion. I want to go and DH has to work and can't take leave, so I'm driving by myself and taking the kids with me.

    I don't really understand why you're so afraid. Make sure your car is ready to go, check all your fluids, tire pressure, make sure the oil is changed, etc. Make sure you have a cell phone and a charger that you can use in the car. And just hit the road. When you're alone, as a woman, you just have to make sure you watch your surroundings and stop at well lit places at night.
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 9:42 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • You should be alright traveling by yourself. If he does not want to go oh well. Go have fun. When my mom traveled with us alone she would sleep all day and then get us loaded up in the van and drive all night. I did that a few times with my daughter. she slept 7 out of the 10 hours it took to get there. we stopped for breakfast, and wandered around the little town window shopping she loved it. Got back in the car she had things to do in the back seat. Had to stop once to go pee and before long we were at the beach. My family was already down there so they took her for the day so I could get some sleep. We did the same on the way back. Now that she is older 7 we can leave during the day and she does good with traveling, she enjoys reading the signs. and looking at the scenery.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:56 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • It sucks that you Dh and Mom dont get along, but is there any way he can go and you all can stay in a hotel instead of with her? I would go whether he went or not. This is your mother, God forbid anything happened to her before your husband said ok, lets go see her. You should go, its not fair to you, your mom, or you children.
    I am not nervous about driving though, I used to drive 20 hours there and 20hours back when I went and visited my family, tx-nv.
    Take your cell phone, make sure people know where your going and when your supposed to get there, call your hubby every time you get gas, if it makes you feel better get some pepper spray.
    I really hope you go, have fun and drive safe!
    cassie_kellison

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 10:15 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I think if he doesn't want to go that's his call, but if you do want to go you should go! Those are your parents and your children's grandparents.
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 10:17 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I go to visit my family without my husband all the time and will continue to after our baby is born. My dad is about a 9 or 10 hour drive and my mom is 18 hours away. When I went to my mom's I stayed overnight at my aunt's house which was a little over half way. He does go to see them during the holidays so it's not like he never goes, just not as often as I do. We don't live near any of our family, so I would rather he spent his vacation time getting to see his family or us going on vacation. I'm a big girl, we have AAA and I have a cell phone. If something happens, it's not the end of the world. Plus I know his mom went on trips with him and his sister without his dad when he was growing up, because they lived away from family and she was a SAHM for a long time, so it's really not a big deal to my husband for me to go somewhere without him.
    Christina807

    Answer by Christina807 at 11:47 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

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