Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What is your 8 year old like?

My stepson is 8. He's a good kid but in a way.. I doubt he's like other children. For starters, he is scared of the pool. We even bought a baby pool that wasn't a foot deep and he wouldn't get in it. Now he plays in the tub and took swimming lessons last year, so he can swim. He walks around talking in cartoon voices constantly. Cries at the drop of a hat about everything. He's deceitful. Lying back and forth between us and his mom. He poops and pees in his pants fairly often. He's starting to be hurtful with his words. Using the "hate" word alot talking to his dad. His mom wanted him to live with us because she can't control him anymore, but that didn't come through as he didn't want to live with us. I just am losing it from Thursday til Sunday with him!! What is your 8 year old like? There's alot more that he does, but that just about covers it.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:44 AM on Jul. 8, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • I have 7 year old stepdaughters..
    they are nothing like you described..

    It sounds like he may have some built up anger inside..
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 10:21 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • My stepson will be 8 in October. His mom told us the same thing, that she wanted him to come live with us b/c she couldn't handle him anymore. He is a pretty good kid for the most part. The biggest problems I have with him are his temper && his back-talking. He has been living with us since May && I have gotten most of the back-talking under control, but we still have a ways to go before I am satisfied with his behavior.
    I really don't know what to tell you though, b/c unless && until he is with you for good then there is no way to modify his behavior. You can try to enforce your rules while he's there, but it is going to be difficult to make him follow with him knowing he is only going to be there for a few days at a time.
    HisMommySince07

    Answer by HisMommySince07 at 10:21 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I am no longer a mother of an 8 year old, but I am now a grandmother of an 8 year old girl who is so full of herself and leader of the pack, whether it's friends or family, that we call her 'bossy bessy.' She has been very headstrong from the beginning.

    It sounds as though your stepson is acting out, for some reasons looking for attention for something, from someone that he's not getting. Not using the potty and using his pants instead, for instance, is a call for attention to himself, good or bad.

    Now, the following advice I'm going to give you comes from being the oldest of 8 kids, and having raised three of my own who are now 32, 28 and 23. I don't think there was one day that went by that at least one of them was giving me a terrible time. But when that would start, I would make an appt. with an excellent adolescent therapist. Because this therapist is so good, and sees only childen, he was wonderful. Good Luck!
    jimbosmom

    Answer by jimbosmom at 10:46 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • My son is 8 and while he does act out, it's nothing like you described. My son tends to test his boundries with back talk and pickin on his brothers but I don't let him get away with it but there are some times when I wanna give up but of course I can't! Then I feel like a bad mom because he acts like this.

    As for your stepson, being afraid of the pool and going to the bathroom in his pants are signs of a bigger problem. I don't think him lying to his mom and you and your husband is deceitful and kids are going to say things that hurt but I think he is testing you. Have you considered having him talk to a counselor or therapist?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:12 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • My 8 yr old son will cry over silly things sometimes, but it's more of a "this is my latest version of a temper tantrum; is it working?" kind of thing. He lies, but it's typical childhood lies "I didn't do it" "My brother did it" "I wasn't in there". Being afraid of the pool - everyone has a phobia, mine is heights, maybe it's just his thing. The cartoon voices, using the word hate, being hurtful with his words, and the bathroom issues are big things in my book, my son doesn't do those things. Well, doesn't do them more than any other child. He'll say he hates carrots or something, but that's it, and will sometimes say mean things, but only b/c he's mad and wants to hurt in that moment; he regrets it almost immediately. I would talk to his ped or a therapist and see if they can help you find out if he is just pushing boundaries more than other kids, or if he has a serious problem.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 11:36 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I have an 8 yr old grandson who no one can control but me; however, my nerves have worn thin with him as well. He is ADHD and has EFD (Executive Function Disorder) so we expect him to act out. Maybe you could get him tested and find out what's up. It would be helpful in deciding what to do with his regarding his behavior.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:46 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • The fears,anger issues,baby talk,and going in his pants could be signs of abuse
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:19 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • This isn't normal behavior and I would advise you to seek a professional opinion on this matter.
    mom2mybabes

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 12:49 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN