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fighting back

My oldest is only 3 but soon she's going to have to deal with a bully. What did you tell your kids about fighting when they were younger and how did it work out? And most of all, how much does "how you handle a bully" realate to dealing with other problems, socially, within the family, occomplishing their own goals, and so on....? I know there are books but I want to hear from several experienced moms.

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kira_5105

Asked by kira_5105 at 4:16 PM on Jul. 8, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

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Answers (9)
  • uh???? "soon she's goingto have to deal with a bully."???? what does that mean. Why put dd into a known situation ahead of time with a bullly?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:18 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • What do you mean by "your DD is going to have to deal with a bully"? What kind of parenting are you doing that you would put your child around bullies? As a parent you are to protect your children from bullies.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:23 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • why would a three yr old have to deal with a bully? If you know she's in that type of environment I'd supervise and when the bully acts up I'd say something. My mom used to always say "let's play nice" I always thought that was a simple and distracted the bad behavior. I used it with kids around my kids and grandkids. Three is too young for the child to comprehend bully behavior so don't explain it, just watch your child. If the child is in a daycare then report the bully behavior so they will watch out for it as well and deal with it.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:27 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I would never purposely put here with a bully! I just ment eventually, some time, in school, she may get picked on!
    kira_5105

    Answer by kira_5105 at 4:35 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • her^
    kira_5105

    Answer by kira_5105 at 4:36 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • My son is 9 and he has dealt with a few bullies.I told him for one to not let stuff they do get to him, try to ignore them as much as possible and don't show that it is affecting him, which really isn't all that easy to do.He has attended martial arts (and will agan this upcoming school year) because it boosts thier confidence,teaches self respect and how to respect others and how to deal with confrontation.And if need be, it teaches him to defend himself.
    I think martial arts would be good,even for a girl.
    kimberlyinberea

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 4:53 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • my daughters first encounter was a friend slapped her.i talked to the mom.to know evail.this was when she was 8..then she turned 10and started to play soccer.well her bff came along and i might add was on the travel team and my daughter was not.this girl scratched my daughter and almost threw her to the ground.once again i talked to the mother.she said she was teaching her daughter to be aggressive.so now i tell her and i know i shouldnt to do what ever she has to.she wont.the mom and arent friends any more.watch the mothers thats all the advice i can give you...
    nana77500

    Answer by nana77500 at 7:10 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • My son was in 2nd grade when he had a bully pick on him.. I told him not worry about it and walk away.. This went on 3 almost 4 yrs... I was so tired of it. I went to school, the parent , teacher. nothing helped or worked.. I finally told him he couldn't hit first but he need to stand up for himself.. so in 5th grade the bully pushed my son . got bloody nose... and that is when my son snapped.. you can only take so much..  it really just depends on the kids and situations i guess.. cause you don't want your child to start it but yet you don't want them to be the one always getting picked on either.

    twistedcandy

    Answer by twistedcandy at 1:51 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • Bullies are cowards, they pick on those who are afraid, and those who will not fight back.. When that bully learns that the kid is not afraid to whack them back, they usually go away..
    My daughter knows not to hit first, but she will hit back.. She refuses to be bullied and I admire her courage..

    Yeah, I know I will catch hell for saying that..
    Mad_Hexer

    Answer by Mad_Hexer at 2:37 PM on Jul. 12, 2009

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