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Do any of you moms leave the Dr.'s office feeling like "do I do anything right?"

We just arrived home from my DD's doctor. Everytime I leave that place her doctor makes me feel like I'm not doing anything right. For instance, everytime I leave, I feel guilty because I didnt really want her to get those shots. What if something happens to her and then how will I feel? When her doctor explains why she thinks its a beter idea to get then, its more her pressuring me and making me feel bad. She is 13 months old and still counts on that bottle at bedtime, and when I tell the doctor she will scream for 2-3 hours or more at night if she doesnt get it, its not a simple 15 minute cry, she says "its not her, its you! She going to be in control if this doesnt stop now." Who said she gets away with everything, she listens good, but likes her bottle. Am I wrong for feeling this way? Do you agree with the doctors attitude toward me?


Asked by Anonymous at 4:24 PM on Jul. 8, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • Doctor's are very good at giving "one-size-fits-all" answers. And the younger they are, the more they rely on the answers they learned in school instead of the flexibily that every different child needs.
    While I agree with vaccinations, I respect that other parents make different chioces for their kids. Another example of "different choices" is bottles. Milk at night will harm her teeth but many babies have a high need to suck. Want to know when I got rid of the bottle? 32 months. It only had water in it but she would scream for hours if she didn't get have it. To help with overnight wake ups, I put a full bottle in her crib and she could help herself if she needed it in the night. Eventually, she was old enough to understand "big kid vs baby" ideas and the concept of the "bottle fairy". That's when I took the bottles away with her active participation.

    Do what your kid needs and learn to edit what you tell the doctor.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 4:31 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • he sounds like an ass, my dd still wants a cup b4 bed & she'll be 3 on the 20th... her doctor said she's fine idk as long as your kid is happy & healthy forget what that ahole says

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:25 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I say if a baby is hungry then feed her! My doctor advises me to stop the night time feedings, but he doesn't give me a hard time like this. You should really have a doctor that you are comfortable with. My son is the same way (11 months) he gets up at night and he screams for hours unless he gets fed. Last night I just rocked him to sleep at 2 am and he woke up screaming again at 3! If I had just fed him at 2 he'd have slept until 6 am. I think some kids just get hungry at night.

    Answer by beckcorc at 4:28 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • My son had a bottel till he was 18 months cas i did not want to hear the crying and he used a cup all day long i had no problem with that. then i gave him a cup with water in it for the transition from the bottal to non. after about a month he did not want the cup cas it only had water and he knew that if he wanted milk or anything else he had to drink it in the kitchen

    Answer by logansmom6106 at 4:29 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • So you are letting your doctor bully you. Doctors must take a special class in that. I have had this happen in the past. Let me tell you, it takes experience, but you can develop the attitude with these six words. "We aren't going to do that."
    You are empowered to take charge and care of your own kids. Make decisions for them. I was thinking the way you did one day about 10 years ago. My grandma told me "GOD trusted you with these kids. Those doctors should also." Made me feel strong.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:29 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Sounds like a good Dr to me. I would appreciate the honesty myself.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:30 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • No your the Mom and what you decide goes. The doctors don't know everything. My son had a bottle at bedtime until he was 15 months old. We just recently got rid of that. If you don't want her to get the shots, then don't. My doc would also say that it outweighs the risks and I did a lot of research on the subject and agree my son has had all his shots.

    Answer by NAT24ROXY24 at 4:31 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • doctors are following what they have been taught that's all. sometimes it fits in with today's world and sometimes not. as for your baby, most babies at that age of 13 mos want a ba ba or boobie to soothe themselves to sleep. See if you can get her with her choice a couple of different nigh nigh toys for her to cuddle with. If she wants a different one multlple times each time of the day she naps or sleeps fine.

    Maybe a cuddle with you with one new lovey and then sleep herself with out you with that lovey and a second one to take your place will work. Kids are manipulative but it's because they're not made any other way. They need care they demand it they get it. And over time they outgrow it. Wait'll she's in her twos or teens like I've got. You'll wish for her to be that screaming 13 mo old instead of a hormanal teen!!! lol jk Put ear plus in your ears and keep her room safe. Ever watch SuperNanny?

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:32 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Doctors think they know everything and want to tell you whats best but it reality mom knows whats best. A trivial amount of power can seriously go to some people's head. Don't be afraid to switch and find someone who is a better fit for your family.

    Answer by sbastille at 4:32 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Oh - and my doctor has been seeing kids for over 40 years. His comment when I ask about something I'm doing or want to do? Usually it's "If it works for you and your baby, it's fine." He's seen enough kids to know that every baby really is different and very little will actually harm them.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 4:33 PM on Jul. 8, 2009