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What do you think of a 13 year old being friends with people in their early 20's?

It's been hot and we've been spending everyday at the lake. My daughter has made friends with a trio of sister's aged 17, 22, and 23. They seem like a nice family, but I have to wonder why they would want to be friends with someone so young?

My daughter isn't the run of the mill 13 year old. She is home schooled, very bright and very friendly.

Am I being weird to wonder why they would want to be friends with her?


Asked by Anonymous at 6:47 PM on Jul. 8, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

This question is closed.
Answers (48)
  • They probably enjoy talking with your daughter because she IS bright and friendly, and, most likely due to homeschooling, is comfortable talking appropriately with people who are older than she herself is. I remember being the same way. In my case, it was actually something of a fault since I was *more* comfortable with adults and near adults than I was associating with kids my own age. I understood adult behavior patterns much better than I understood the behaviors of young teens like myself - all the twittery "does he like me" girl talk made absolutely no sense. I could relate to a college age young women because in strange ways, our interests were much more similar.

    Answer by eema.gray at 11:25 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Oh yeah, they just called to make sure we were going to the lake today.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:48 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • yeah its weird. I stopped a freindship between my son and boys two years older when he was ten cause of bad activity. if they're public schooled with your homeschooler that could be troublesome. I'd cut it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:50 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • No offense, but in my experience with home schooled children ( I worked with them as a professional), they have been socially immature. I don't mean this as an insult, and while bright, they seemed to lack common sense street smarts that they would have otherwise gained from being around peers in the school system. They may just be having fun with her or taking advantage of her influencing her in a negative way. Girls are terrible about this.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:51 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • O no way. I am very particular about who my kids hang with. The mentality is so different when they become teens. Those girls are more mature and know more about the world than a 13 year old. Best to nip it in the bud before they get her in trouble.

    Answer by emtmom847 at 6:58 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I disagree with the pp. If she was socially immature, the likelyhood of the these girls even giving her the time of day is even more slim. It could be that these girls are somewhat socially immature and find your daughter to be quite accepting of them and friendly. I dont think its bad, per se, but I would monitor this friendship. Keep yourself in ear shot of them if you can and ask her questions frequently. I wouldnt assume that they are teaching her things that she shouldnt know, but I wouldnt rule it out either. My daughter was about 9 when we met a girl who was 13 at the pool. This little girl was left at home every day while her dad worked. My mom felt sorry for her and befriended her. We let her come home with us everyday and we fed her. She was so attatched to my 9 yr old daughter. They were such good friends and it worried me because I couldnt understand. I think it was because the girl was so immature. A friend is all

    Answer by momofsaee at 7:01 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Big mistake. What in sams hain do they have in common? I was friends with a 20 plus year old, so was most of friends, it led to very adult behavior. At that age girls try to act like woman, some boys aren't worth the dirt on your shoes and will take you up on that.

    Answer by Glickstein at 7:04 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Also one other thing I wanted to say was that children who are homeschooled might not have all the street knowledge to deal with all the same levels of issues, but usually, I find that to be a blessing and not a disadvantage. In fact, I am beginning my journey on the homeschooling process in a few months. I have decided that we are done with public school. My 6th grader, my 2nd grader and my 3 yr old will be taught at home. My teenager will be going to a private school because shes almost halfway through highschool. If it slows them down or hinders some of their rapid social development....then Im cool with that. Just wanted to encourage you to not look at this as a bad thing...the homeschooling part. Again...just keep an eye on her and keep dialogue going.

    Answer by momofsaee at 7:05 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Your thoughts are mine also . Why on earth would girls of that age be interested in your daughter. I would curtail it for sure.

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 7:07 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • formula for disaster. There is no reason for a friendship with ppl so much older. Goodness knows what they can talk her into doing bc she's probably a nice girl and wants to please ppl not to mention she's at a curious age and vulnerable emotionally. I'd try to get her interested in doing things with your family or find other friends closer to her own age.

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:07 PM on Jul. 8, 2009