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do you cuddle with your kids right after putting them on punishment or spanking them?

My 6 year old just got popped and put on punishment for acting up in camp today...by me. But I miss him so much and want to sit and cuddle with him...I just got home from work. My hubby says no...to be tough and let him understand that we're upset.No bashing please. Thanks.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:12 PM on Jul. 8, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (41)
  • I think after they have been punished they need to be comforted to know that even though they make mistakes you still love them.
    sbastille

    Answer by sbastille at 8:13 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • No. They're in trouble for a reason. I'm not going to turn around and coddle them so that my previous words and actions mean nothing.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 8:13 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • After the punishment is over, then I do cuddle. And I explain to him that he did wrong, but that no matter what I still love him and just because he was punished doesn't change that. I think it's important to reiterate that to a child so they understand that your feeling for them don't change just because they screwed up.
    TheDiva320

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 8:16 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Maybe after a couple of hours after they sat and thought about what they did
    looovemybabies

    Answer by looovemybabies at 8:18 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I have verbalized love before during and after punishment but had them sit apart for a while for their righted wrong to sink in.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:18 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • ditto Ginger0104

    they've been punished for a reason, to undermine that with a cuddle will confuse them and cause more problems down the line when they know they'll get punished but right after Mommy's gonna take it back basically.

    hypermamaz

    Answer by hypermamaz at 8:19 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Ohhh mama...I so know what your talking about. I still feel like that when I discipline or punish my 14 yo. I'm probably the one that's going to get bashed. When I really lay into her...I feel so guilty. While I feel it's true what your dh said...I know you miss your kid when you've been gone all day. I usually give it a few..then go for the hugs/cuddles. 

    Loryl

    Answer by Loryl at 8:20 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • depending on what he did, but my kids dont like to cuddle so usually not.. if i am sore with them then they know it and a punishment is a punushment.. cuddling dosent make it go away...
    2cuteboysrmine

    Answer by 2cuteboysrmine at 8:21 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • usually I give her a few minutes of me being "mad" at her and dealing with her punishment.... but she's only 20 months so I do pick her up and explain how i LOVE her, but I do not love what she did! But whenever I'm away from her, I just want to hold her and love her! when i'm right next to her I want her to sleep or go away for a few minutes... i'm the only person taking care of her with no breaks ever so it's intersting......
    07lilmama1108

    Answer by 07lilmama1108 at 8:25 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Well my DD is only 20 months old but yes I do. I hug her after a time out and tell her why she got one. I am tough but still show her so much love.
    delilahsmom1177

    Answer by delilahsmom1177 at 9:19 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

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