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I feel selfish and weird for thinking maybe I do NOT want more kids. I am so happy with the ones I have I don't wanna stir the pot. But we planned on a big family. Is this odd/un natural/un mommylike?


Asked by hibbingmom at 9:52 PM on Jul. 8, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 35 (71,876 Credits)
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Answers (7)
  • The first 4 years are the hardest. If you get to 4, you see the light and you rethink what you want. Our first was 3 and I swore I'd never have another. But we did and it was the best. for about 11 months that is... then he turned into demon baby and at 20 months old I swear only 2. I only want 3 if they were all 20 years old and giving me grandchildren.

    Answer by lynnard at 12:57 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • no your not a bad mom. If anything your a good mom for knowing what you can handle.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:56 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • no ur not i wanted 1 hubby wanted 4 we said 2 after the first i really dont want more i love her and she is enough for me!

    Answer by preggoinmn at 9:58 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • I don't think so. I only have 1 child && I don't really plan on having any more. I have always planned on a small family. Just because you don't want to have a whole bunch of kids doesn't make you a bad person.

    Answer by HisMommySince07 at 10:02 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • How old is your youngest?? I am just wondering if that is a factor! Lol. We are pregnant with #4 and are just taking them one at a time. We would love a big family, but who knows!

    Answer by micheledo at 10:04 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • Go with your heart. After our first two I said that was it. It was so busy (16 months apart). After the youngest was about 2.5, I started to see the light at the end of the tunnel and now we have. But even if you never feel that way, you are smart to listen to yourself now instead of just 'sticking' to a number you set. i wanted 4 children, but it really looks like we will be stopping at 3.
    Not that you would, but if there is any question, I wouldn't do anything permanent (like getting your tubes tied) for quite a while. I have too many friends that did that out of exhaustion of the first one or two and totally regret it now.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:19 PM on Jul. 8, 2009

  • It depends. What does your hubby think? It's just that I'm dealing with this from the other side. My husband wants to be done after this one (our third), but I've always wanted a large family. And when we were dating and got married, he agreed with me. So I kind of hurts that he wants to stop now. I'm really disappointed. I don't think this is a decision you should make all on your own. What I'm saying is that I don't think you're selfish for wanting to stop, but you could be selfish for arbitrarily making that decision all on your own, if hubby isn't ready to stop, because in a way you have led him on (not on purpose of course). Of course, you need to listen to yourself, too, because you would need to carry and take care of more children if you had them. It's a fine line, I guess.

    Answer by tyrelsmom at 1:49 AM on Jul. 9, 2009