Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Seriously, why is it?

Why is it that good men, and good woman never seem to find each other...it seems like if there is a good man out there, he gets crapped on, same with women? My BIL is one of the best ppl I've ever met, a good hardworking man, wonderful father, supported and loved a kid that didn't even belong to him..and what does my sister do? Leave him for a loser...a complete idiot who was still married.My ex husband? Dead beat, mama's boy, neglectful. I was good to him, supported him and his daughter while he didn't work THE WHOLE MARRIAGE...Sorry I'm just venting...I just want to find a GOOD MAN!!!!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:09 AM on Jul. 9, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • They come along when you least expect it. Just be yourself and you will find one. I found a great one and feel grateful..but it took a while. Patience will prevail. And don't EVER feel like you are just not good enough for a certain person. Love is not about being "Good Enough." We're all on the same playing fields so to say. I know, I sound so "Hallmarky" but I'm positive there a match for everyone out there and its a matter of time before he/she comes along. Sometimes we just get blinded and end up with the wrong person. Hang in there.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:14 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  •  think that a lot of the "GOOD" people out there get taken advantage of. I think the bad people out there are looking for us good folks to manipulate. I don't think it always happens though. I finally found a great guy that is on my same level totally. We are two peas in a pod & are attached to each other's hips. I was lucky though, & i snatched him up so fast. Once i found out how wonderful he was, there was no way i was letting him slip out of my hands. You'll find yours one day.

    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:14 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • get up with your BIL....or send him to me!
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:22 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • there at there just gotta hang in there... and as for any relashionship.. (don't know what goes on behind closed doors).....

    twistedcandy

    Answer by twistedcandy at 9:22 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • I think the good and the bad tend to be attracted to each other.

    Kind of like how women think that if a man treats her like crap, then he likes her. So she's always looking for the jerk. And men tend to do the same things.

    My "good man" kind of fell into my lap and I realized how great he was, and I had to almost talk him into giving me a chance because he was looking for something else. His ideal woman was one who treated him like crap. And that wasn't me.

    So to find a good man, you need to change your way of thinking. Stop looking in the wrong places for them. Most of the time, they are not in bars and clubs, but in libraries, museums, and churches. Stop looking on the outside, and tell yourself that even though you're attracted to the "bad ones" you need to maybe look for a guy that you wouldn't consider. Try dating a new kind of man, and see what's on the inside.
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 9:25 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • some people's bests in life just aren't with the opposite sex. I'm realizing that my strengths without a man are pretty good. I love volunteering, sitting at the ocean and biking with my kids and watching them grow and come into relationships. But I've told all three that they are worth of life and love of good friendships to work and live without a man or woman in their lives.

    I don't want them to grow like just about every one of us women do and be incomplete without a guy. I also talk alot with them that maybe babies will be in their lives adopted or birthed maybe fostered by them or maybe not.

    It's not something that's a guarantee because a girl, woman gets periods. How many of us here on CM and elsehwhere know that, a lot. I remind them that those of us who have strong strong maternal instincts can also nurture themselves holding someone's hand in hardship in a hospital or an animal needing help in a shelter.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:33 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • i'm with ya honey...maybe good people crave bad people. and hence we never hook up with whats good for us. i dunno thats just my shot in the dark because i dont honestly believe that. the 3 guys i have been with have always been the boy next door type and have done the worst things you can ever do to a person!!!! except for the 1st guy i was with...as far as i know he was the best guy that i have ever had and i let that go for the asshole i ended up marrying so i guess i reaped what i sowed. is there any hope for me? i broke up with the 1st guy when i was 19 because i didnt want to cheat on him and he wasnt spending time with me. and got with this idiot. left him..got with another idiot who abandoned me while prego with his first child and then ended up back with the 2nd idiot (even married him) that has used me ever since...i thought he had changed...he was cool at first but his real colors showed when he had me trapped.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:53 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • Maybe in a cosmic sense its how we find balance in the world? Like how in every story there has to be that struggle and so as in life?

    or maybe evil can sense evil and doesn't like the competition?

    Good people are always trying to make things better, so when they see something/one good, they don't bother with them because if its not broke, don't fix it?

    Those are my theories.
    Lesli

    Answer by Lesli at 10:03 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Relationships
Where can I find????

Next question overall (Politics & Current Events)
W.W.P.D?

close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN