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What should I do?

Ever since I got pregnant & my son was born, my fiancee turned into a total d**k, i mean, my son is almost a year old now, but when he was about 2-3 mons i was standing him on my lap, and my fiancee said better watch out where you step son, you'll fall in. Then the day we got home from the hospital I went to get something to snack on cause I didnt eat any hospital food cause i hate it, but i went into the kitchen and he was telling me about how much i eat, and i need to be worrying about loosing weight now that hes here, not gaining. He does little things like that, and says little things like that, that make me feel so bad about myself. I dont know what to do. I feel so bad about myself. Im about 5'6'' and weigh around 160, thats not that bad is it??? i want to leave him, mainly because hes the reason i feel so bad, and he doesnt understand why i feel like this when i try 2 explain 2 him it hurts me. what should i do about it


Asked by Anonymous at 9:53 AM on Jul. 9, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • Your weight sounds fine, and I'm sure you're a beautiful woman.

    If my husband were saying things like that, I would be more angry than hurt. He has no right to say hurtful things like that to you. Not only is it mean, but it's disrespectful. I would be like "who the HECK do you think you are to say those things to me?". You are better than that. And you know you are.

    You could try pointing out his flaws and picking on them every chance you get, but that's just playing his game... I would tell him that he's not going to talk to you like that... Period.

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 11:29 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • I think you should tell him how it makes you feel when he says stuff like that. See where that goes and maybe you two need to take a break from one another.

    Answer by raemommy at 10:01 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • ASk him why he's saying things like that for? Tell him you'll like it very much if he would stop being that don't like it. good luck

    Answer by incarnita at 10:02 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • I would explain that those subjects are off limits. My Dh doesn't discuss anything like that unless I bring it up first. I also am extremely sensitive about the housework comments. More than likely because in that case he's normally right, but he now knows that he can't even joke about that because it will upset me.

    Answer by Lesli at 10:05 AM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • He knows what he's doing when he does it. Saying hurtful things keeps you wounded and weak and in his control. You have to let his words roll off your back to regain your emotional strength. Don't listen to the words that are being said, listen to the intent behind the words and maybe that will help you not receive them. Your weight sounds fine but if you let him know it bothers you that he says that stuff he will continue to bully you like that. My mom used to tell me to laugh at verbal bullies like that. Even if it hurts, don't let them know it. After a while you learn not to take their words personally. It's their issue not your's unless you accept it. Don't accept it. My dd does that "Whatever" response when others say things hurtful. That works for her. Laughing at them works for me. Find what works for you but don't accept the hurtful words.

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:26 AM on Jul. 9, 2009