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what are the ways of punishment you all use?

i hate to whoop my kids i don't think that it really makes a difference when i whoop them , i think sitting them on the couch for time out is stupid cause it just gives them alittle rest... i know with 3 kids i should knw more but i need help...


Asked by destiny2 at 3:01 PM on Jul. 9, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (8)
  • I mostly try to do natural consequences. I will also do grounding to his room. Time out has never worked for my oldest, and my youngest, well, you would have to hold him down. There are things that they do get spanked for, but those are rare. For example, normally my boys get to watch a movie before bed. If they stall on cleaning up their toys, they run out of time, and don't get their movie. If they hurry, they get a story as well as a movie. My 4 year old is also learning that if he doesn't do as I ask, I won't do the things he asks. Which means he has a lot less fun. I think this way works well, because it seems to more enforce the "treat others as you would like to be treated" idea, and, the consequences are still there, often, even if you don't see the offence. To me, discipline isn't about making them behave, it's about teaching them how to treat others.

    Answer by tyrelsmom at 12:09 AM on Jul. 10, 2009

  • I rarely punish (meaning negative, punitive reaction to misbehavior) - I prefer to Discipline - proactive, positive, reinforcing good behavior. When I do need to discipline in a negative manner, it depends entirely on the behavior - if he hits and does not stop when asked, he is put into his room as a reminder that hitting people creates a break in the relationship and they don't want to be with you. If he refuses to listen, then it depends on what's causing the lack of listening - sometimes I just need to remind him to use his listening ears. Othertimes, it means privileges or activities are taken away until he can show me he can listen again. But this is my child - each child is different and you need to find what discipline works best for each of them - no one discipline will work for all kids. The more you know about them, and about yourself, then you'll find you have more choices for discipline and less need to punish.

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 3:09 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • I use timeout most of the time, but others I use bribery. Many mom's will disagree with using bribery but it works for me! I always know what it is my 3 1/2 year old would be really upset to loose that day (it always changes) and threaten to take it away when he acts up. Usually it changes his attitude but not always. For example.....yesterday I took him swimming. I knew the day before we were going to go so all day anytime he would act up I would just say "Do you wanna go swim tomorrow?" And he would say "yes" so I would tell him if he didn't stop whatever he was doing then he didn't get to go. He would straighten up every time. But you can only use the same thing for so long before they just don't care anymore and you have to be prepared to back up what you say. I was prepared to cancel swimming every time I said I would if he hadn't started behaving. Just do what works best for your child just stay CONSISTENT!!

    Answer by littleguys_rule at 3:12 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • I like to think of it as discipline rather than punishment. You set the rules for your home. Depending on the age of the child, you can explain the rules. With very young children, you start with just a "no" when they start to get into something you don't want bothered. You can move them away. If they go back, give a swat on the leg, hard enough that they feel a little pain. If you spank on the diaper, it won't do any good. With older children, you tell them one time when they are doing something that is against your rules. You do not threaten, count, or do anything else. You tell them once to stop. If they continue, you spank, being sure that it is hard enough to be felt. If you will do that consistently, you will have well behaved children. You are spanking before you get angry with the intention of teaching them to respect your authority and to obey. It works!

    Answer by NannyB. at 3:12 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • well i whoop but i do try hard not to, i make them stand in the corn with arms down and nose thouching the wall, or facing an open wall hand straight up ad standing on their toes, or one of my SOs favs is to put them in the "lairs chair" which is where there put there back againest the wall and their arms straight out in front of them and get in a sitting positition... or if more then one is envolved i turn them againest each other bye having them all line up in front of me and i ask one a question about what happened and tell the others not to open their mouths... and i always end up with the truth about what happened and why and whoever was at fault gets in trouble... ohhh or with a spanking make them wait for and be scared of it... i send them to bend over their beds and wait until either me or daddy is ready to whoop their butt... that always works...

    Answer by lilliedoll at 3:13 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • We give time outs to my grandson... and lots of them, lol! With my own kids (now 19 and 21), I did the whole taking away things, but they just didn't care. When we moved from our first home, my kids were 16 and 18 and I took bags and bags of toys and stuffed animals from the attic - all things that were once taken away and forgotten.

    With my grandson, the punishment usually fits the crime, I guess. It's either his room, or the time out wall, or he doesn't get to do something or go somewhere. As a last resort, and only for dangerous things, does he get a slap on the wrist or bum. (not a whooping, but a light slap).

    Answer by eternallymom at 3:30 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • we're still working on this one. we use a combination of talks, lectures, time outs, spanks, and "lock down" which is an extended time out in your room .. usually on your bed

    Answer by hibbingmom at 7:48 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • I get down to his level and tell him what I expect (he is 4 and a half ) and what will happen if he does not listen.
    I typically make him take a time out on my bed or give tell him he will GET A SPANKING...and all that is, is a swift smack on the butt
    Oh and if we are in a store and he doesn't listen to me I warn him that he will sit in the cart....This is like telling a teenager that you will hold their hand in public, lol
    Being firm and looking them directly in the eye is what it takes for them to really listen
    I will never put him in the corner or facing something as a is demeaning and If I want him to be respectful I must first show him abuse and nothing demeaning...
    I treated my first 3 this way and they listen to my
    WORDS when I SPEAK....and respect me

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 2:09 AM on Jul. 10, 2009