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Looking for ways a non custodial parent can still express to their children that they are thinking of them

My stepson is convinced that his mother doesn't really care about him. She talked to me about this today and wanted to know what she could do that would remind him that she loved him when they weren't together. I suggested to her that she could call everynight before bed or even stop by every day to say hi. We are not opposed to that at all. Are there any other things that she can do that may help him understand that she does think about him?

 
Mom1Stepmom1

Asked by Mom1Stepmom1 at 3:48 PM on Jul. 9, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 14 (1,498 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I think her best bet would be to call every day or every other day, etc. She should definitely call more. When she sees him, tell him, right away how much she missed him. Tell him about things that happened when they were apart that she wishes he had been there to see/do. As in, we went to the zoo. It was fun but would have been so much better if you could've/would've been there.
    That said, I would also be careful that she doesn't cross the line into the I need you/miss you so much/can't survive without you mom. That's not good either.
    Debbie062008

    Answer by Debbie062008 at 5:28 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • Just sending a greeting card for no reason is nice. Maybe she and her son can become penpals or something
    motherofanaries

    Answer by motherofanaries at 3:50 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • Take some pictures when she comes by and let him have them, this would really help. But the best is a call EVERY DAY!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:52 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • She lives about 15 minutes away, and sees him two days a week. That is the only contact that they have, period! Hopefully the back ground helps?
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 3:53 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • Maybe he could go over there one more day a week since it's so close. I agree with the phone calls. When he is with her maybe she can ask him what his favorite things to do are. Maybe there is something that he likes they can do together.
    officerjoeys

    Answer by officerjoeys at 3:57 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • Calling, sending cards for no reason, visiting when she can.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 4:17 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • Cards, letters, ph calls, emails, stopping by to say hi and talk. If you're not opposed to it and there is no reason for her to NOT be allowed to do this, then maybe when school is back in session she can come to eat lunch with him once or twice a week.
    Aidans_Mom915

    Answer by Aidans_Mom915 at 4:19 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • Maybe you could help her set up something fun for them to do together. Or help her to be more involved in his life-let her know when something special is coming up at school so she can be there.
    Guaranteed

    Answer by Guaranteed at 4:40 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • I HAVE FIRST HAND EXPERIENCE WITH THIS SUBJECT, AND RECIEVED SOME GREAT ADVISE.... START A JOURNAL TO YOUR CHILD, WRITE IN IT AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE, JUST WRITE DOWN YOUR THOUGHTS, AND HOW U ARE FEELING ABOUT YOUR CHILD...SAVE IT UNTIL YOUR CHILD TURNS 18...THEN GIVE IT TO HIM, IT WILL BE A VERY WELCOMED LOVING GIFT THAT WILL LAST A LIFE TIME, GOOD LUCK AND HUGGS
    tammylyn1971

    Answer by tammylyn1971 at 4:44 PM on Jul. 9, 2009

  • This woman asking U, the stepdad, is really immature and naive, cuz personally I believe kids get over that shit with more street smarts, strength, character, will and determination to achieve and accomplish anything they put their mind to in life. So nothing she does or doesn't do at the moment is going to change anything. We have a saying, ALO HECHO PECHO.
    milmiracle

    Answer by milmiracle at 5:24 PM on Jul. 9, 2009