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Playing vs. spoiling

My baby is very sweet. I play with him with his toys b/c he doesn't like to play alone. He is 6 months old and his father tells me he is spoiled rotten. When ever my husband watches him he always puts him in he swing, the jumper, tries to get him to watch TV. I on the other hand son't let him cry. When he gets upset I figure out what he needs and I take care of it. ANd sometimes it means pulling out the toys.

Am I spoiling him too much?

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QuintinsMom520

Asked by QuintinsMom520 at 10:37 AM on Jul. 10, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 4 (29 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • you can NOT spoil a baby - it is impossible. A child under the age of one can not be spoiled.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:39 AM on Jul. 10, 2009

  • You are being a parent. Your husband is being...a man.

    Your baby NEEDS stimulation at this age. Well, really, for the next 2 years stimulation is gonna be super important. Granted, babies can/will/should learn to play on their own...and he will. But he's not quiet at that age yet. Give him another 3-5 months and he'll be pulling toys out on his own. But for now it just sounds like you are being a good mom.
    CarolynBarnett

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 10:41 AM on Jul. 10, 2009

  • no such thing as spoiling a baby sounds like your hubby needs to get his act together & your dong the right thing by playing with the baby
    maiahlynn

    Answer by maiahlynn at 10:42 AM on Jul. 10, 2009

  • You cannot spoil a baby at all, it is a proven fact. So you keep playing with him all you like. Your husband should come around soon to playing with him soon. When he starts crawling and walking and is really able to play back your husband will come aroung then. At least he should.
    TeriMelisa

    Answer by TeriMelisa at 10:42 AM on Jul. 10, 2009

  • I hate that people think you can spoil a baby. He sounds like he doesn't want to be a parent or paly with his child - I hope thats not the case. Educate him - pull up information from the internet and bring it home for him to read. That's what I had to do with my husband, who said the same thing to me however our son was 1 month old at the time.
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 11:04 AM on Jul. 10, 2009

  • You really can spoil a baby. It's not very common though. I worked at a day care and we had one little girl that had to be held. if you put her down to tend to antoher child she would cry and cry and cry until you picked her up. We tried distrations, made sure she wasn't hungry or dirty, gave her time on our lap, but if she was next to you instead of on you or being held, she wasn't happy.

    Anyhow, to answer your question, no you are NOT spoiling your child! If you held him every time he cried maybe. But you are getting down on his level, interacting iwth him and making sure he is cared for. That is healthy. Putting him in a swing and ignoring him is not healthy.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:47 AM on Jul. 10, 2009

  • Anon, that's not spoiled, that's high needs. I'd bet money that there was something else wrong with her(allergies anyone?). I was like that and so was my sister and we both had allergies that weren't diagnosed. Emi was like that until I dumped the allergens from our diet.

    OP- You're not spoiling him. Your husband is being neglectful. Although I don't think you should tell him that. Or maybe you should. I dunno.
    Arisce

    Answer by Arisce at 11:58 AM on Jul. 10, 2009

  • You can't spoil a baby with attention and love; he is trying to justify his own neglect.

    Pick up Dr. Sears' Baby Book and Attachment Parenting book and leave them by the toilet for your dh. Dr. Sears also has a free e-mail letter he send out.
    happytexasCM

    Answer by happytexasCM at 12:19 PM on Jul. 10, 2009

  • "You really can spoil a baby. It's not very common though. I worked at a day care and we had one little girl that had to be held. if you put her down to tend to antoher child she would cry and cry and cry until you picked her up. We tried distrations, made sure she wasn't hungry or dirty, gave her time on our lap, but if she was next to you instead of on you or being held, she wasn't happy."

    She wasn't spoiled; she was just high needs. A child this young only has NEEDS.
    happytexasCM

    Answer by happytexasCM at 12:21 PM on Jul. 10, 2009

  • You can try to glorify it by saying "high needs", but I think it has a lot to do with parenting, personality, and yes, spioling. Holding a child all the time will make them want to be held all the time. How many of these "high needs" babies development more and more clinginess as they grow? I'd be willing to bet all of them! The more they get, they more they want and demand. Most kids need balance, not contast attention to flurish. And yes, this child got better and learned to play with the toys and other kids because we weren't giving in to her (we just plain couldn't! and we knew it wasn't in her best interest). No I'm not saying attention is bad. I'm not saying don't hold your kids. I'm just don't like when parents are at an extreme then try to place the blame elsewhere. I do accept that some kids need more, but I honestly believe that some kids are truly spoiled too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:19 PM on Jul. 10, 2009

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