Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What's the difference between judging someone and having an opinion?

I am aware that I judge people and situations, and I am comfortable with myself. I see a girl dressed like a hooch, out with her three kids, and I think that girl looks ridiculous! Can't she save that outfit for home with her hubby? I see a woman holding a baby in one hand and a cigarette in the other, and I think Classy.

Now here's what keeps me from the bitch category, I never judge people out loud. I am friendly and kind to others, because there's no need to act rude toward others.

So is there a difference between having the opinion that it is wrong to smoke while holding a baby and thinking that same woman is trashy for doing so?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:00 AM on Jul. 11, 2009 in Just for Fun

Answers (7)
  • You can state an opinion objectively which is doing it without name calling or assuming the worst of someone. Judgement is more of a verbal attack that is uncalled for, usually does involve name calling and drawing conclusions that may or may not be true.
    Lesli

    Answer by Lesli at 2:04 AM on Jul. 11, 2009

  • That's actually a good question, but it's hard to say. To add to you question, is it judging when you are stating fact? Like you are a bad mom because you are smoking crack while your child is breastfeeding. That was hypothedical but is it judging????
    luvmygrlz

    Answer by luvmygrlz at 2:07 AM on Jul. 11, 2009

  • I think that "judging" is completely in the eye of the beholder (actually, the judgee, in this case) I feel judged when someone doesn't know enough about the situation to form an opinion about it but does so anyway. I know I'm guilty of judging people and situations too. I think all of us are to one extent or another. But the OP is right, we don't have to be mean about it or tell the world about our judgements.

    Luvmygrlz, for example, let's say that in your hypothetical instance of a mother breastfeeding while using crack. What if she was addicted to crack against her will (like in Taken) and lives in a hell without enough clean water to dilute formula, or enough money for the formula itself? In this instance, breastfeeding may be more healthy than the baby getting watered-down, giardia infested formula, given the fact that not a whole lot of crack will make it into the milk.

    Just hypothetical. I'd have the same opinion
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 2:17 AM on Jul. 11, 2009

  • When you agree with me, you're stating your very well informed opinion. When you disagree, you're being a judgemental bitch.
    Avarah

    Answer by Avarah at 2:37 AM on Jul. 11, 2009

  • An opinion is more general. "I don't like red lipstick".

    A judgement is making an assumption based on your opinion "All girls that wear red lipstick are tramps. You are wearing red lipstick and must be a tramp."

    Niki_sd

    Answer by Niki_sd at 6:01 AM on Jul. 11, 2009

  • We all make judgements. I am very selective of who I allow into my "inner circle". I base my selections on my own beliefs, values and personality. As a mother, I have preached, "Show me who your friends are and I'll show you who you are" all their lives. I pray to God they make their choices fairly but carefully.

    However, just because we personally deem certain people unacceptable, it is not acceptable to bear malice or speak unkindly to or about someone based solely on our opinions. Each one of us has the undeniable right to be who we are and treated with common courtesy, regardless of the opinions of others.
    mariposa0218

    Answer by mariposa0218 at 11:46 PM on Jul. 12, 2009

  • In my opinion everyone can be judgemental. but alot of people dress or act or do the things they do because of the way their life has been. for instance if a woman or man was treated wrong as a child or abused in some way they may do the same thing when they get to be an adult. if a father beats on his childrens mother in front of them than they think that that's how they r suppose to live. trust me it's not right but that's the way of life. but everyone also has their own ways of being. a girl can dress in a way that some may think that is sluty but that could also be because she gets attention that way and she has low self-esteem and wants it even if its not good attention. I've been judgemental before but I also know and think that you should know somebody before you start actually being verbal about it. until you know the situation I would just keep it to yourself.
    crazy8

    Answer by crazy8 at 2:09 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN