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when i yell at my 2 yr. old son...

sometimes he makes the saddest little face...he doesnt cry...but he just looks so sad and he will try to yell back at me, but since he doesnt really talk yet, he just kinda waves his finger in my face and his voice gets louder. this really breaks my heart for 2 reasons, 1- feel like he really has hurt feelings. 2- he actually tries to tell me how things are gonna go and im the mom, damn it. so when this happens...i usually just say, well im the mom and you have to listen to me. do you ever feel like you are being mean to your kids when really you are just being a mom and trying to teach them???

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:53 AM on Jul. 13, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (4)
  • all the time!!!! I tell her no... over LITTLE things like flushing the toilet over and over and over.... and over and over!! She STORMS off to her room, arms crossed and sits in the corner looking like I do when I'm about to cry!!! It breaks my heart!!!! I always run over and say "just because I said no, does not mean I do not love you!!" Then give her hugs and kisses and she gives them back but I can't believe how quickly she can make me feel like that!! She's 20 mos!!! And he sounds really cute btw!!!!!
    07lilmama1108

    Answer by 07lilmama1108 at 7:42 AM on Jul. 13, 2009

  • Yeah, but you have to be strong and teach them early so you don't have problems later. Try to take comfort in knowing that you are doing the right thing.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:17 AM on Jul. 13, 2009

  • I don't yell at my kids. You can say no and set limits without raising your voice. Different kids need different types of discipline too - my daughter is now 7 and I sometimes have to send her to her room over things, my 9 year old son I barely have to look at wrong to make him straighten up.
    But yes, sometimes I wish I could just give in and let them have their way - it would be so much easier now although I would pay for it in years to come.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 10:37 AM on Jul. 13, 2009

  • I don't yell - but I am stern. When I do raise my voice (not to the point of yelling), my son had once told me that I'm not supposed to use mean words - to him, raising my voice was using mean words - and he's right if I'm not careful about it. Yelling does hurt kids feelings, it does make them sad. That doesn't mean I don't discipline, but I do discipline in a manner that is respectful to him, does not hurt his feelings, and does not leave him feeling like he's just been humiliated. Yelling leaves kids humiliated - not a good parent/child relationship. And learning to be flexible means sometimes, he does get to win and get what he wants. Each situation is unique, so I try to respond accordingly and not set myself up for a "no" when "yes" is perfectly acceptable for both of us, so long as I'm willing to relax and realize that this yes does not mean everything afterward is yes too. Flexibility...it's a good thing.
    JPsMommy605

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 11:06 AM on Jul. 13, 2009

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