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Help, please....

My husband and I are separated, and he only sees our daughter in passing, and maybe watches her for a couple of hours every three or four weeks so far...he takes little to no initiative to have responsibility for her and take care of her. My real problem at this point is this. We are not living together, and I want to do the right thing for myself and for my daughter, and last time I was at my Human Services department I picked up the abusive relationship pamphlet, and our relationship, even in being separated, fits many of the signs of an abusive relationship. What is the next step? How do I know if it is enough to feel he is not a good influence for our daughter? Has anyone been through this? I KNOW it is an abusive situation, I just don't know what the right way to go about it all is.

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:36 PM on Jul. 14, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • the fact that he isn't seeing your daughter and doesn't care too would be enough evidence for me. i would get all the assistance you can and get on with your life. i had to put myself in save the family maybe you can find one in your area. a place that helps women get back on their feet after being abused or had drug problems. i helped me out a lot.

    Answer by melody77 at 9:39 PM on Jul. 14, 2009

  • Why is it so hard for you??? You say it is abusive. Your main concern should be your daughter and keeping her safe.
    Don't tell me you are worried about his feelings.

    Answer by Necie11 at 9:39 PM on Jul. 14, 2009

  • call the number on the brochure and talk with a trained counselor

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:10 PM on Jul. 14, 2009

  • Necie-
    It IS abusive, which I've already acknowledged and my daughter IS my main reason for posting this question. It's not hard for me at all....I just wanted to see what insight I could get from the ladies here because they often have good words...and a lot of times in a situation that is just overall "HARD", having the support and reinforcement of someone's words is extremely empowering and helpful. I'm not worried about his feelings at all. I simply wanted to see what others had to say on the situation, and if anyone had experienced anything similar. I wasn't looking for anyone to treat me like I'm stupid, which I absolutely am not. I don't really think there was any reason to be rude. Thanks for the "advice." -OP

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:58 PM on Jul. 14, 2009

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