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Am I being bitter for seeing women on here who are happily married and getting really upset?

Im 22 weeks pregnant and Im all by myself. My sons father walked away from us because he found strippers and drugs more intersting than being a dad. I just see women on here and I feel so bad for doing this, but I hate them. Its like, why cant I be that happy? Why cant my babys father see how much I just want him here with me? I want him to help me decorate the nursery and I want him to rub my tummy with our baby in it. How do I get these feelings to stop? Its like, not a day goes by that I dont think of him and just go in the babys room and cry. I envy women who have happy lifes and loving fathers for their children. But I envy them so much that I am starting to hate them. It just dosnt seem fair. (Please no bashing) I just want these feelings for him to stop and I want to be able to see happy moms and feel happy too, but I dont know how?


Asked by Alysia_Moore at 1:01 AM on Jul. 15, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 12 (688 Credits)
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Answers (16)
  • ur post made me want to cry! i remember having those feelings too, i seperated from my daughters father just b4 xmas ( 3yrs ago) & all i could see were the happy families celebrating the holidays 2gether & getting thier family portraits taken & thats all i wanted was just to be a family to be that "picture perfect family" & i hated all those people...even though i KNEW i was better off w/out him i still wanted to be a family. its hard, its awful i cried my eyes out sooo many times after i put my daughter to bed but then eventually it got easier...slowly i realized that it was ok just me & her, we were a team & i started to feel happy again. its going to take time, it sounds so cliche but it does get better. surround urself w/good friends & family. you'll be ok, get therapy if u need to be healthy & take care of yourself 4 ur baby. good luck! msg me if u want.

    Answer by beachmom0703 at 1:39 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • Instead of being envious and jealous focus on making your life better for you and your child, you will have that happiness one day as well, it comes easier for some.

    Btw happiness isn't always about having a man in your life, you need to make the most of what you have

    Answer by JAJA_Steele at 1:05 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • Its understandable why you feel this way. I mean, he abandoned you (the jerk!) and you have all these hormones. I'm sorry you're going through a hard time. But soon you'll have your baby to love and to occupy some time.

    I'm married and it's not all happy all the time. But i'd feel the same way if i was in your position.

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 1:05 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • Im sorry your babys daddy sucks.... But once the baby gets here maybe you'll feel happy when you see happy moms because you'll be one of them. Theres someone out there who'll love and respect you and your little one, it just may not be who you thought. Congrats on the baby.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:05 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • Yes girl you are being bitter. The same thing happened to me and I divorced when my dd was a baby. My advice is to do yourself a favor and get the anger, bitterness and disgust for your ex and circumstances out now. Get in therapy and get a good lawyer to take care of the custody situation now so that when your baby is here you can really enjoy it. I let my anger linger on for years and those years were wasted. Don't let the same thing happen to you. Your life will get better. Just keep your head up. Get the help you need to move on without shame or letting your pride get in the way and enjoy your life. You are going to be a great mom. You'll be fine.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:06 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • I would probably feel that way too. That has to be incredibly hard. I'm pregnant too, and I have my husband...and I'm still stressed and feeling so weird...and emotional...and scared. There are so many feelings going on, and I can't imagine going through it alone. However, what you have to remember is that you're NOT alone. There is a little baby inside of you that is going to love you more than anything else in the world. It's going to come out and want nothing and no one else more than you. And you're gonna feel the same about your baby. I know that doesn't fill the void that the baby's father is supposed to fill, but maybe it will be of some comfort. I can guarantee that when you see your'll be a happy mom. I wish the best for you, and if you ever wanna talk to someone, I'm on your friends list. :)

    Answer by StefanieN84 at 1:11 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • I don't really ENVY persay but I do ADMIRE. IDK, I have been alone for years and I get a little sad when I see moms talk about their "DH" and I see pics and stuff but I just embrace their friendship I enjoy seeing other women happy. I think I just live vicariously through them. I think Valentines day makes me more sad but.....I am pretty easy going. WHAT I DN"T like is when moms on here have said things to me like "at least I have a man". Now that makes me mad!

    Answer by Mamasita98 at 1:18 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • popcorn


    Answer by Anonymous at 1:19 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • My husband and I seperated for a few months after the birth of our twins. He freaked out. Anyway, during that time,I thought that everywhere I looked there were happy people and I basically plotted revenge on all the happy people. I just had to make myself move on and deal. And now, things have worked out and we are the annoying happy people. I hope everything works out for you!

    Answer by corinnejenkins at 1:24 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • I was thinking more about your question, and thought of another reason why you shouldn't feel as unlucky. Think of how many women would envy YOU because you're able to have children. There are so many women, single or not, who would never be able to have a baby and would give anything to. Some of these women may have husbands, but they can't have the one thing they want most. Think of how many times they've watched happy moms and realized that no matter what, they will never be able to experience what you are experiencing right now. You, however...may not have a husband, but you have something VERY special..AND you will find another man, and he will be WAY better to you than the last one, whether he is your sons dad or not. Just try to think positively and remember that, babe.

    You know...after just telling that to you, I realize how freakin lucky I am too for being able to be a mom.

    Answer by StefanieN84 at 1:26 AM on Jul. 15, 2009