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My one year "13months" old smacks herself & others, pulls her hair, and bite herself..When she gets in trouble or doesn't get her way.

WHAT SHOULD I DO?!?!!? ISN'T THIS WAY TOO EARLY FOR THIS!??!?!

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nicole0709442

Asked by nicole0709442 at 9:36 AM on Jul. 15, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 5 (80 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • it is a communication thing. until she gets the verbal skills to tell you I AM MAD- this is an easy way to express how she is feeling- good for her for getting the emotions out :) When my son did this, I would just hold him and say- you are mad- aren't you? are you MAD? I would hold him until he calmed down (not always easy) so he couldn't hurt himself- and I would use words and sign language if possible- if even at 1 he hit someone else- I went to the kiddo that got hurt and paid total attention to them- then told me son no- time outs didn't work at one- and this is JMO- but why spank a kiddo who is hitting? It just didn't work for us at one- at 18 months he was able to go into time out for bad behavior, but 13 months is just too young....
    don't worry though- this is NORMAL behavior :) hang in there!
    jessicasea

    Answer by jessicasea at 9:47 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • Redirection. She is frustrated and has no other way to express herself. Redirect her, get her interested in something else. She CAN understand what you say, just can't say the words to express it. So, sympathize with her "I know you're upset honey. It's hard when you can't have something. Hey do you want to look at this book".

    No, it's not too young if you aren't teaching her how to be angry and not redirecting her to other things. Before she gets too out of hand, when you first see she's mad, use it as a teaching moment, "You're mad, can you show mommy your MAD face, see this is mommy's mad face (make a very melodramatic mad face) what is YOUR mad face". "Can you say, MAD?"

    Learning to express yourself well has to be taught, it is not a natural thing.
    Petie

    Answer by Petie at 9:48 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • i agree with the other ladies! She doesnt understand how to manage & deal with her feelings yet.. I felt like such a bad parents when my dd was doing this.. but thankfully they DO get through it, just guide them in the right direction! :)
    MommaTasha1003

    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 10:04 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • It is normal, she just can't verbalize what she wants, needs or feels. Do NOT spank her or hit hier back. Remove her from the situtaion, tell her "hitting is not nice", " use gentle touches". You will have to do it over and over again, but she will eventually get it. It is part of her development at this point.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:00 AM on Jul. 15, 2009

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