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How to deal with....

I have 2 children with my husband, 3 and 4 yr old. He has an adopted son- 8 and a little girl -7 with someone else. We live in WY and the mother lives in MN 10 hrs apart..... this boy will not stop calling everything stupid- won't quit talking about death and murdering things and talks alot about his "balls" and poop- my kids catch on and its hell to make them stop- at home the mother lets him do this or just puts him in the room shes a native drunk :( DRAMA QUEEN and likes to start crap with me..... my husband works ALOT at a mine so i'm stuck with them for the month but my concern is IS THIS KID PSYCO? And how do I get him to behave? Timeouts don't work talking to his father don't work and his mom told him to be bad here- i don't want my kids saying anything that kid says - I can't even go to the park with other people there cause other parents get mad at me- HOW DO YOU MAKE SOMEONE SO MEAN BEHAVE????????????????

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tonipaffel

Asked by tonipaffel at 3:23 PM on Jul. 15, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 9 (342 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • If it was me I would tell my DH to send him back to his Mom..I wouldn't take care of a kid like that..Be a danger to my kids.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 3:28 PM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • Yep, I'd send his little psycho butt home.
    Cherrie522

    Answer by Cherrie522 at 3:42 PM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • If this child was adopted as an older child, not an infant-in-arms, then there are probably underlying issues related to his previous social history PLUS he more than likely has issues related to his adoptive parents' divorce. Think about it, this kid has been basically uprooted and "abandoned" at least twice - first by his bio parents and now by his adoptive parents. Typical kids have issues with divorce, I can't imagine what must be going through this child's mind & heart considering all he's been through in his short life. Acting out b/c of his hurt, anger or fear would not be unusual given his circumstances.

    You need to have a serious sit-down with your DH & figure out what you all are going to do to address your SS's unacceptable behaviors. Counseling definately comes to mind, both individual for your SS and for the family as a whole, because your SS's behaviors are affecting all of you, not just him.
    mom2aspclboy

    Answer by mom2aspclboy at 3:49 PM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • Tell the boy everytime he says something unacceptable that it's unacceptable (first off...) We have friends come over and even family that talk like that. I just tell them that I don't want to hear it because it's not something I like hearing. As punishment, send him to a room (sort of timeout style) because it gives you a break, and keeps him away from the other kids. After a couple days of this, if he hasn't stopped, tell your hubby that something has to be done because it's not good for your kids. Whether that something is counceling, or family fun activities. I know that may sound bad, but if you show him that you are a nice person and you lay down the rules, he may enjoy coming and not being a brat everytime he comes over.
    mammacjjc85

    Answer by mammacjjc85 at 5:44 PM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • Boys talk about poop, fighting, murders, and anything else that will get a parent going. It does not mean that he is psycho. You need to lay down the law. These are the rules of the house. These are the consequences. Obey or suffer.

    He could probably benefit from some one on one bonding time with you. It takes time, patience & love to undo what has been done.
    motherofhope98

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 5:51 PM on Jul. 15, 2009

  • I have tried everything sometimes the best thing to do is give up.... NOTHING WORKS!
    tonipaffel

    Answer by tonipaffel at 6:59 PM on Jul. 15, 2009

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