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Do i have the right to be angry?

I have 3 year old autistic daughter and she can't talk. She can make noises but she cant talk. Lately she has been screaming everyday almost all day long. Well my husband is getting so fed up with her this morning he threw a shoe at her. By the way she is my daughter and his step daughter. He is mean to her all the time cause he is sick of her screaming. But it's not her fault she cant help that she cant talk.

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:52 AM on Jul. 17, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (20)
  • You should be more then angry. You NEED to set him straight and make it clear to him that him treating your daughter in such a manner is unacceptable! You are her mother, it is your job to protect her at any and all costs.

    Throwing a shoe and being mean to her is abusive.

    Answer by TessLouise at 11:54 AM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • Oh, mom....your post almost makes me cry. My dd is mildly autistic and she can talk sometimes. I get frustrated with her but never to the extent of your SO.

    I wouldnt tolerate ANYONE treating my dd like that...maybe you should find someone who is compassionate towards your dd and willing to help her through tough times....

    I know it breaks your heart! B/c my heart breaks for your dd....


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:56 AM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • not only do you have the right to be angry as her mom and a human being you have the obligation to be angry and take action against your husband


    Answer by boredmom44 at 11:56 AM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • op here... I have told him several times to stop. I have screamed at him he has made me so mad but he does it anyways and tries to make me feel bad because she is making his ptsd flare up i guess. whatever he pisses me off

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:57 AM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • Throw a shoe at him and ask him if he likes it! That is totally unacceptable and is domestic violence. It makes me so sad that there are people like that out there. I saw a lady drag a down syndrome girl by her arm so hard she screamed, I shouted at the lady that that is abuse. Poor girl was looking for someone for protection, what is she doing behind closed doors?

    Answer by kirsty_mcgrail at 11:58 AM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • I was raised with a stepdad who didnt like me. Your children will HATE you for letting him be mean to them. and your child having a disability is 100 times worse. you need to kick that damn a$$hole out of your house. thats what i would do.. protect your children not your marriage. your kids are worth more

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:59 AM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • You should be more than angry. If he was so fed up, why not walk away? Why not go outside, or just in another room? Autistic or not, no child should have a shoe thrown at them b/c the parent or stepparent is frustrated. If he is mean to her, I would have to seriously rethink whether I wanted to be with him. Does he understand autism? I don't know much about it, but I know that autistic children behave very differently sometimes than "normal" children. I wonder if maybe he doesn't really know anything about autism and is behaving this way b/c he really doesn't know she can't help it. But, yes, you definitely have the right to be angry.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 11:59 AM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • call an abuse center
    your husband sounds like an abuser
    please do not allow his behavior

    will keep you in my prayers

    Answer by boredmom44 at 12:00 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • yeah, with anon :59 - i was raised with several of my mom's boyfriend's living in our house (not at the same time) & a few of them were awful to me & i'm NOT disabled & it sucked & i still kind of resent my mom for making me put up with that crap & putting her relationship before her kids. and it's a thousand times worse, because your DD is autistic & it's not even his child.

    Answer by Wheepingchree at 12:03 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • he knows what autism is. In fact we got in a fight one night and he told me before he met me and my daughter he use to make fun of kids like her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:03 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

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