Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

what do i do? Are older boys a bad influence?

My son is 7 and there is a boy that moved in next door who is 11 he will be 12 this year. He sometimes has other boys 11 or 12 around and my son wants to play with them. I just don't know if I want my 7 year old running around with older boys. This neighbor boy "Sam" is alloud to run around the neighborhood unsupervised, often getting into my neighbors yards and whacking down plant and flowers, he is alloud to hang out inside the gas station just behind my house and is also alloud to walk down to another gas station about a block and half away along a busy highway. So is his 7 year old sister who plays with my 8 year old daughter. I have caught my son twice hanging out at the gas station looking at gun magazines with Sam. These children do not have to check in after school, getting off the bus and coming straight to my house. I don't want to deny my children friendship but I'm going crazy trying to control this behavior.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:59 PM on Jul. 17, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (4)
  • I don't let my daughter who is 6 play with the neighbor girl who is 9....I think the age difference is just too great at this stage of their lives. I definitely wouldn't let my 7 year old hang out with 12 year olds. 12 year olds are terrible (in general). Especially since these particular children have no rules to follow, this is totally going to rub off on your son. Really 12 year olds have no business hanging out with 7 year olds.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:53 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • Too big of a difference in ages, and with no parental guidance/supervision and restrictions it just sounds like trouble waiting to happen. (Like, 12 yo daring 7yo to do something wrong and 7yo doing it and getting caught while 12yo dashes off.)

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:27 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • thank you for your responses! I just can't believe the freedom this lady gives her children, even her young daughter can go where ever she likes. The girls are often whispering things (i can hear of course) sometimes this other girl is trying to get my girl to sneak things or sneak places I don't let my girl go.... same with the boys. I haven't been comfortable with it since they moved in and they started coming over everyday afterschool. I asked this little girl if she didn't have to go home and tell her mom she was there. she replied No my mom knows I'll be around here somewhere. I would go crazy not knowing where my young children were, or they didn't come home afterschool... it just blows my mind.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:54 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • I don't think its so much an age thing as a lifestyle thing. The 8 yr, old seems to have just as little supervision as the 12 yr. old. I would feel uncomfortable about what they were exposing my children to as well and would only let them hang out under MY supervision.

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 11:32 AM on Jul. 18, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.