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what do you think

DH and i have never had any jealousy issues at all. I am not the jealous type. SO anyway DH is very flirtatious with a lot of people joking(with men) and flirting with most of our friends.

We have these friends Lisa and Jason. they used to be in a relationship and have 2 kids. As long as they don't live together they get along and are good friends. Recently she moved in with because she broke up with her boyfriend. we hang out with jason a couple times a week for softbal and cookouts.

4th of July Lisa was supposed to join us for the fireworks. dh started texting her to see where she was. she decided not to come. Since then they text each other all the time. at first he would tell me what she was saying all the time. Monday night their son had to go to the hospital for chest pains. DH texted back and forth with her all night came back he was dehydrated. The next day DH saw Jason and played off like he did not know(wierd right

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:38 PM on Jul. 17, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • when i called him on it he was like i don't want to start problems with them. I asked how it would start problems he said he just thought it would. I told himthat was lying and if he didn't think he was doing anything wrong he should not lie.

    Since then they text all day and he brings his phone everywhere, even the bathroom, which he never did before.

    Lisa talked to DH Saturday and said she was worried I would get upset with them flirting. DH told me so on Sunday i took the time to talk to Lisa and let her know it did not bother me but I would let them know if it did.
    Now i am wondering why she was worried if it is just innocent flirting and why he is being weird. Am I worrying for nothing? I am not jealous by nature but I am suspicious of this behavior. I Know DH does not have time for a physical affair but i worry things might go to far.
    And he made a public comment on her facebook picture "this is my favorite, your so Hot
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:41 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • which I donot think isappropriate fora married man! I just read some of his text and am not happy!! He has erased his inbox but not his outbox, he is talking about positions and porn!! I do not know what to do but he has crossed the line!! WHat would youdo first 2 answers are fromOP
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:43 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • I would be concerned. This is not about you being jealous, it's about him being inappropriate. It's nice that he's supportive when the child goes to the hospital...that's a nice friend....however, I agree with you, he's being suspicious.
    Also....why do people think that their spouse does not have time for an affair? Because they come home at night? My husband had a very long-term affair during his lunch hour.
    EireLass

    Answer by EireLass at 9:45 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • he does not have a lunch hours he gets a break early in the morning. then picks the kids up at the sitters on the way home. when he is not working we are usually together
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:48 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • it's still inappropriate imo. I think she asked just to see if she was pushing your buttons and to see if you were suspicious. I think she has her sights on your man. I'd talk with Jason and see what he thinks about it. That way everyone knows what's up. No secrets
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:48 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • I'd tell him straight up and have a drink straight up to give you courage if you need it, that he needs to be respecting you and not inspecting some other woman.

    If he doesn't straighten up then tell him to check out the chick on his own time. You don't share anybody. Go into counselling if he won't listen, likely he won't. Stand your ground hun. Otherwise it gets far worse. He owes you respect and you deserve it. Get it being with him or get it by showing him you don't have to have him in your life.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:50 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • havin been there it does get worse it starts off innocent ....my Dh atarted makin excuses to go to the store or he would take sick time and miss work to see his "friend" if they want to have an affair they will find away to do it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:54 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • I would be talking with my so called "friend" about this as well. She knows good and well this is inappropriate. I would tell her you do consider it wrong and it is crossing over the line. As a matter of fact I would have a better friend with me and I would tell the both of them together. Tell him to his face and hers that it needs to stop. Get mad about it and stand up to them both. Put that little tart in her place. Heck I would go with you in a heart beat if I were your friend IRL
    pnwmom

    Answer by pnwmom at 10:35 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

  • I agree with most of the other posters. This is totally inappropriate, and it's probably time for your friend to find a new place to live.....and your husband to change his phone number and stop texting her!! If he's not doing anything wrong you should be able to look at his phone at any time. He shouldn't be texting other women regularly....period!
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 11:50 PM on Jul. 17, 2009

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