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Low libido
I've always had a problem with low libido, and I've never figured out why. I now have a 4.5 year old son and a 5.5 month old daughter, plus I work from the home as a secretary and general "go-fer" for my husband's business, so my days are FULL, nevermind the hyperactive, temperamental children. I know with a baby this young and breastfeeding, there are certain things that I don't enjoy like I used to, but my husband is incredibly discouraged that once a week is all either of us can muster at this point, and sometimes not even that (like when mother nature comes to visit). Has anyone ever figured a way out of this problem? It's not that I don't find my husband attractive - I think he's gorgeous! But I'm just so stinking TIRED, and he doesn't even get in the shower until midnight! (Sorry, it ain't gonna happen if we're not clean!) He knows I'm tired, and he is too a lot of times, but what can we do about this?
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Asked by Anonymous at 12:25 PM on Aug. 20, 2008 in Relationships
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Hey, ya'll are stressed and tired--its normal!!!
It sounds like you need you time, and both of you need together, no kids time.
What is the babysitting situation? Do you have family that can take them from time to time? Or friends with kids that you could trade for date nights? Or one of those handy responsible teen-agers looking to make an extra $30?
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Take a day off and go to the spa---if $$$ is an issue, see if your area has a massage training program---is a good way to get a cheap massage (and often just as good), which goes a LONG way in making you feel better... Find a place to get a manicure and pedicure. Take some bellydancing classes, or just buy a DVD (he'll enjoy it later!) and practice in your down time...eating healthy and exercising (especially at something that makes you feel attractive) goes a long way for perking up the libido. Read trashy romance novels, watch steamy movies--even if its just you! Buy naughty lingere.
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When you get to the point you are at (and believe me, I sympathize AND empahize), it can take some work to get back the sizzle...
Go out dancing or just to the movies, or whatever...if going out is difficult to arrange, have someone take the kids and plan a romantic dinner...if finding someone to take the kids is difficult, wait it they are in bed. Since icky work yuck is an issue, shower together. Shower together in a candle lit bathroom. Buy that funky colored foaming soap or soap paints that they make for little kids and have at it.Found an answer to your question?
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Good Luck!
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