Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Why is spanking okay?

If hitting your spouse is abuse then why in the world is hitting your child okay? Some could say that hitting a spouse is a form of discipline so what's the difference? I find it very sad that some people use spanking when there are many other forms of discipline that work and do not harm your child in any way.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:35 PM on Jul. 18, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (15)
  • I totally agree. People who spank have anger issues, lack imagination and need some parenting classes.

    Answer by IhartU at 1:37 PM on Jul. 18, 2009

  • I agree also. Spanking just doesnt benefit the child at all and is so mean

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:45 PM on Jul. 18, 2009

  • I choose discipline depending on what my child does. I mean when people spank their kids for hitting them or hitting other kids....that's just can you say "we don't hit." & then spank your kid? Everyone has their own way's to punish their kids. Usually a time out or taking away a toy is enough but I must admit I"m guilty of swatting them on the butt. My son it 2...I think I've spanked him (if you call smacking his diapered butt once spanking) maybe 2 or 3 times...that was when we was out of control throwing himself on the floor screaming banging himself against the wall, dresser, whatever tantrum. Mostly, it was to stop his erratic behavior and it worked. IDK that I'd ever actually consider spanking my SO. That just seem's odd to me. In my thinking when I've spanked my kids it's because of their unwillingness to communicate or listen & a swat on the butt stopped that cold.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:45 PM on Jul. 18, 2009

  • So when your child goes running into the street, what do you do? Say "Little snowflake, please don;t do that it makes mommy sad, and you could get a boo-boo!"

    Or when your child pushes another child down the stairs? Do you say..."Little snowflake...please don't do that again, mommy might have to give you an ice cream cone?

    Please. If my child is endargering himself or another child, they are going to learn VERY quickly that that behavior is unacceptable, and it will NOT happen again!

    You think parenting is so easy? Wait until your children mouth off to you, or as teeenagers start sleeping around, defying your demands/rules, etc.

    NO PARENT makes it through parenthood with perfectly behaved "soldiers" for children! Your children are either too young, or you only have one that you can hover over 24/7!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:48 PM on Jul. 18, 2009

  • I think you surely have better things to do rather than start a fight....right? I mean, I am completely confident in my parenting choices and how I choose to discipline my kids. I didnt say whether I spanked or not and usually I dont even bother discussing it with others unless they ask. Disciplining children should be private and done in the privacy of the car, the restroom or at home. So why there is so much chatter about the way moms discipline children is beyond me. No one will know how I do it unless I tell them. I think that if youre insecure enough to bring it up, then you might need to become more confident in your choices. Only moms who are questioning themselves, criticize others for how they do it. Otherwise, it wouldnt even cross your mind....and you wouldnt care.

    Answer by momofsaee at 1:49 PM on Jul. 18, 2009

  • Anon 1:48, my oldest is 16, doesn't sleep around, drink or smoke, doesn't bad mouth me and is very respectful- as are my other two children. Perhaps your lack of parenting skills is why your kids are so out of control they need to be punished all the time. My children learned right from wrong and to obey rules without being hit or cursed and screamed at.


    Answer by IhartU at 2:01 PM on Jul. 18, 2009

  • I am just wondering what people's reasons are for spanking. I think it is wrong but others think it is okay. Others are entitled to do what they feel is best for their child so why can't I ask them this question? My method works great. I use time out. I have siblings as well and we were never spanked as children. All of us have done well in school and know right from wrong. We acted out sometimes but time outs and being talked to worked. We learned from our mistakes and grew into law obiding citizens. I just don't see how spanking is truely beneficial with all the other options out there.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:03 PM on Jul. 18, 2009

  • Different children respond to different things. Sometimes one child will be good with just time outs, and another will be rebellious and not respond to time out. Also if a very small child does something dangerous, a time out doesn't do anything, as they wouldn't understand. A swat on the butt doesn't really damage them, but it tells them that what they are doing hurts them.

    Answer by rachel_817 at 2:11 PM on Jul. 18, 2009

  • And I am tired of judgmental people. Spanking isn't for everyone. Spanking isn't abuse. The point of spanking is to hurt the child physically but to bruise their ego. It is called negative reinforcement punishments I believe. Timeouts and shit don't work for my son.

    Answer by purpleducky at 2:48 PM on Jul. 18, 2009

  • I use spankings when I feel it's necessary but I also use time outs and groundings, it all depends on what they are being punished for. Spanking is not abuse.

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 2:55 PM on Jul. 18, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.