Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Can you please help me? I don't know what else to do.

My boyfriend is an alcoholic and I was just wondering if I should call his mom and let her know. I mentioned it to him and he accused me of not loving him and said that he would hate me if I did but I don't know what else to do. They live about 7 hrs away but he keeps doing this to me and I have no idea who else to talk to about him. I'm worried.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:37 PM on Jul. 19, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • Yes he needs help calling his family will not help him I mean atleast they'll know but he has to check into rehab and it has to come from him.

    You can leave him and come back if things changed. GL
    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 10:41 PM on Jul. 19, 2009

  • You are taking a chance staying with him if he is an alcoholic. Unless they want help, I've heard it is very difficult. You should consider the consequences of staying with him.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 10:42 PM on Jul. 19, 2009

  • Call. It'll only get worse if he doesnt get help!
    MommyLee08

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 10:45 PM on Jul. 19, 2009

  • I'm sure his family knows. They might be in denial about it but you don't just wake up one day and turn alcoholic. Call them though. Maybe they can intervene and get him help
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:46 PM on Jul. 19, 2009

  • Tell them.
    I just went through the same thing.
    Cherrie522

    Answer by Cherrie522 at 10:49 PM on Jul. 19, 2009

  • I would tell them.
    Lauren24

    Answer by Lauren24 at 10:50 PM on Jul. 19, 2009

  • You can tell them if you feel the need, maybe it would just help you to have someone to talk to about this, but I really don't think his mom can do anything to help this situation. He is a grown man, I'm sure he's not going stop drinking because his mom says so. He really needs to get into a rehab and go to AA. Tell him he either has to get help or you will leave him. Make him choose. But you must be prepared to follow through. Hopefully it'll shock him and make him decide he wants you and any children you may have. It won't be easy for him, and it'll take alot of support from you.....but if he's willing then you can give him your total support....if he isn't then you have no choice but to leave......at least temporarily. GL
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 10:57 PM on Jul. 19, 2009

  • I called his mom and let her know what was going on. I told her that he does the whole binge drinking for a couple of days and that we are on and off because of it. She said she would talk to his dad and figure out what they can do for him but as far as I go, she has no idea what to tell me except for to not give up on him. I feel wrong for doing it because she had no clue that he was like this.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:14 PM on Jul. 19, 2009

  • Alcoholism is a disease.. an addiction. It can be cured, but it takes alot of hard work on your part and his. If you truly love this man, then you will be proving it by sticking with him through this. The first step really is to get him to admit or at least realize that he has a problem. He will need as much support from family and friends as possible, so it would be wise to call his family if they have been good influences on his life until this point. Try to find out what is causing this problem.. convince him to check into rehab and start going to weekly counseling.. someone he can really open up to and talk about whats really been bothering him. Keep him away from all alcohol, not even one drink is acceptable in his recovery. No matter the occasion. Dont expect this problem to be solved overnight. Part of the healing process is relapse.. over and over again. this is where you come in. be patient. good luck to you.

    Rainys_Mommy

    Answer by Rainys_Mommy at 11:23 PM on Jul. 19, 2009

  • I am the daughter of an alcoholic and the granddaughter as well. I also have a sister and a close friend who are. My mom said that if she came across this again she would give the person a choice, 60 meetings in 60 days and if he picks up a drink in that 60 days then she would be out. She told me to never let myself into that type of a situation. You have to give him an ultimatum and then stick to your word. If things change then you can go back, but he needs to realize there are consequences to what he is doing. I wish you luck.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 11:30 PM on Jul. 19, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN