Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

i need help with this one..... PLZ NO BASHING

ok so my man and i have been engaged for 4 months
and this last week i told him that he need to change some stuff
like smoking weed and selling weed
and also some other shit he does
he got mad at me and said everyone tells him that and he aint done it
so why would he change for me
well i really love him and cant see my self with anyone else
but him not changing is hurting me
iv told him that and he said he might do it
so idk what to do like i said i cant see myself with anyone else but him
any advice

Answer Question
 
19bubbles91

Asked by 19bubbles91 at 1:32 AM on Jul. 20, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 5 (68 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • He's not going to change. You can't fix him. It's time to go.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:37 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • what if you are at home and the police raid your house? then you would be in trouble for it too. I'm not sure about the laws and if you would be charged too. what if he's sent to prison later on. where do you see yourself and possibly your children?
    he won't change. i wish you luck.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:43 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • o.k anon.... my husband smokes 24/7 sells once in a while,, but it doesn't really bother me it doesn't interfere with him being a good dad or a provider to our house hold,, so tell him you really don't like it mabey ask him not to sell anymore because you really don't want him being stupid and getting caught also make it clear it's not to be around the kids, but as a means to relax and take off a load should not be a problem
    mirit.rose

    Answer by mirit.rose at 1:43 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • he smokes cuz when he is sober
    he get grumpy and he depends on weed to much
    19bubbles91

    Answer by 19bubbles91 at 1:46 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • he is addicted to it. does he treat you good? if he's good to you and you really love him then you can maybe learn to overlook the weed. but if it bothers you now, it will bother you later on.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:50 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • I'm sorry but good role models for a child aren't going to sell weed. Its illegal and depending on how much he sells he could go to prison for a long time. Is that really what you want around your child? Something to think about.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:52 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Where do you draw the line? If weed is ok, what about meth or coke or heroin?
    If he slides on this you'll never be able to put your foot down.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:58 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • im trying hard not to let him slide
    he started doing and selling x
    i told him if he did it anymore im leave so he stopped
    form what i know
    19bubbles91

    Answer by 19bubbles91 at 2:02 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • I think you know what you need to do. Until you are ready to leave the relationship you will have to deal with this behavior from him. Sadly, his behavior will eventually affect your childs life. Children need parents that are good role models for them, and quite frankly, this man is not that. I wish you luck and be strong for you and your baby. You can do it, don't forget that!
    ronjwake

    Answer by ronjwake at 2:42 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Get out, get out, get out. He's not going to change and he sounds like he's already dependent on substances. It will only get worse. Please, trust me, I have a lot of experience in this area. Getting married is not going to change a damned thing, except then it will be a thousand times harder to get out of the relationship when you finally have had enough of his addict BS.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:24 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.