Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

to whoever has given up a child for adoption..

i give you BIG props for being strong enough to do that! i was watching a show last night on a very young couple who chose to give their baby up for adoption and i cried my eyes out! it really takes a lot of courage to be able to do something like that.

Answer Question

Asked by exxOHjackie at 1:48 AM on Jul. 20, 2009 in Adoption

Level 9 (345 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • I agree.

    bow down


    Answer by Cherrie522 at 1:50 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • did you watch the season finally of 16 and pregnant?


    Answer by Alysia_Moore at 1:59 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • you rock


    Answer by Alysia_Moore at 1:59 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Were you watching '16 and pregnant'? That show made me cry too.

    Answer by NOLAmommaKRYS at 2:04 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • EXXOHJACKIE, Thank You for saying that, it truly is un-imaginable what one goes through when one relinquishes. Courage, had nothing to do with MY relinquishment, but mine was done with coercion. When a Mother gives birth to her child, she will forever be that childs mother. One cannot become an un-mother. She prays each day/night, that what she did, by doing something so profound, that her child is safe, healthy and as happy as any child deserves to be. She never knows for sure, yet her faith or denial, not sure which, keeps her hopeful. The tears you shed from that moment in time, are endless tears for the irstmom. Whether it is something she "chose" or not, she will undoubtedly, shed tears in her silent moments of when she is alone, and saddened byher plight. The shame fo some, is unforgiveable, but only by her own unforgiveness. She silently wonders, and she silently wanders...when..where......cont.

    Answer by ceejay1 at 11:43 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • will they one day wish to see her face..know her heart...and understand her journey???? Blessings to you, the shows we see on T.V., do not give the whole journey...for how can has to live that journey. Blessings, and Serenity, C.J.

    Answer by ceejay1 at 11:44 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • It is important not to generalize about the reasons mothers relinquish children to adoption. For for some moms it does take courage to place their children for adoption, for many of us moms, it might be more a lack of courage or many other factors that influenced our decisions. Many moms are pressured by others to “choose” adoption, and are not strong and confident enough to stand up and reject the idea of relinquishment.

    In fact, I did not “choose” adoption for my son as much as I went along with the plan because I was too scared and desperate to do anything else. I allowed it to happen. But I never “chose” adoption because I was brave and courageous. If I had believed in myself more, I would have parented my son. I bristle when people tell me I was courageous, because I was not. It was the most regrettable and worst decision I ever made. It is just as courageous too to parent despite tough odds.

    Answer by Southernroots at 12:47 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • It is not a courageous thing I did. I placed my son for adoption bc it was best for him. I could not provide for him. I knew I could not give him the life he deserves. I pray everyday for my little boy that he continues to be happy, healthy, and loved by those who come across his path. The adoption is an open one so I am able to see and know how he is doing. Not courageous but a neccessary action in order to give him a better chance in this world

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:22 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Though I understand the sentiment behind your words, I was far from courageous when I surrendered my son. Infact I was weak and frightened and failed my son in the worst of ways because I did not contain the strength to speak up that I wanted to keep my son in the hospital after he was born and instead placed him in his amom's arms.

    The only person who is courageous is my son who I surrendered. He never had a choice, or a voice, when I gave birth and surrendered him and yet, he remained strong through a childhood of abuse and neglect and faced things with his amom that I cannot imagine ever being able to live through.

    And yet he did and he didn't allow it to pull him down. He is the one who deserves any and all praises for being courageous, for having the strength to face a life he was put in without any say-so and not allowing it to take away from who he is and will become.

    Answer by bellacocco at 3:44 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • I cryed my eyes out too! They are doing a big show now where all the teens talk about how everything is going and they are going to bring the daughter she gave up for adoption so she can see her again, i know i will cry with that episode!

    Answer by serenaxxmarie at 6:07 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.