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Any advice for a soon to be married 22 year old woman? what makes or breaks a marrige? How do you keep yours stable?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:42 AM on Jul. 20, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • comunication is a big one, my hubby and I always talk if one of us have an issue with something, we don't keep secrets, and we talk about everything
    looovemybabies

    Answer by looovemybabies at 2:47 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • I have learned that communication is the key to a healthy relationship! My mom and Dad have been married for 19 years and Mom has always told me that and it has been 4 years for me and has worked! Good luck

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:48 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • I got married at 22, been married 18 years (this November) and finally had our first child a week ago (another story). Anyway, there are a few things I/we have learned over the years, first: ALWAYS kiss each other goodnight, second, never go to bed angry talk it out, if you're not ready to talk explain that and ask for some time, third spend time apart - my girl friends and I have a girls weekend usually once/year and I make sure my hubby has some guy time, either a guys weekend or days he spends with just the guys with no complaints from me. Fourth, go to marriage seminars/courses to strengthen your marriage. While there is no guarantee, remember that love is a choice you make everyday, you choose to love your husband, it's not just an emotion. Many blessings to you!
    finallyamom40

    Answer by finallyamom40 at 2:50 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Honestly...I keep my relationship stable by doing one thing.

    I just love him. That's all I do. I stay fully committed to him, I never lie to him, I tell him what is on my mind whether his ass wants to hear it or not, I listen to him equally, I respect him, I respect his morals, I respect his opinions, I back him up whether he is right or wrong, I tell him I love him EVERY single chance I get, and from the time I wake up in the morning to the time I go to sleep at night I'm thinking of ways to make him a little happier. A back rub after work...Making his favorite dinner...Texting him something sweet.

    Everything I just named is simply and truly LOVING someone. That's all you have to do baby girl :)
    queeeeeenb

    Answer by queeeeeenb at 2:53 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • And yes, I totally agree with finallyamom40. We kiss each other good night before we go to sleep, he kisses me good bye before he leaves the house, and we make sure we get an "I love you" in before we hang up the phone. Like I said, just love him!
    queeeeeenb

    Answer by queeeeeenb at 2:55 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • LOVE, patience, kindness, compassion, empathy and the ability to forgive.
    sw33t_blond3

    Answer by sw33t_blond3 at 2:57 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Oh what to say that hasn't been said already? The one thing that I will say is make sure that you give of yourself and he does the same. Marriage is hard at times,but mostly it is great. There will be times that you will disagree but when you communicate with each other and listen to one another it will make things better. Marriage is a great thing and should be taken seriously. It is a full time job that you should work at for the rest of your lives together. Congrats and good luck!
    ronjwake

    Answer by ronjwake at 3:11 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Besides all the great advice above, go to church together. The family that prays together, stays together. All marriages go through tough times, you want to have already made the commitment (your husband too) that divorce isn't an option. Plus having a church community is a God Send if something really bad happens (my daughter got really sick). we have been married 25 years. I practice what I tell my children, love isn't a feeling ...IT IS a commitment.
    moneymagnetmom

    Answer by moneymagnetmom at 5:06 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • I've been married 21 years and my advice to you is to keep the fun in your marriage.  

    beeky

    Answer by beeky at 7:08 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Understand that your future husband will not be able to meet all your expectations and that he is not to be responsible for your happiness. That's too big a load of responsibility to put on him or on anyone else. Realize, too, that the warm fuzzy feelings and the physical attraction will wane and that you must be willing to do loving acts even when you may not "feel" so loving. Know that true love is a commitment to seeing that your spouse becomes the best person that he can be and that seeing that happen will require sacrifices on your part. Be willing to be totally unselfish where your own wants and needs are concerned, and always be willing to do what is best for him and for the marriage. It will be of utmost help if you put God in authority over the marriage and do what is pleasing to Him. He becomes the third party in your marriage and thus the mediator. Be prepared to work on your marriage on a daily basis.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:46 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

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