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broken hearted

how can i get over a relationship that didn't work out the way i wanted it too? Im having a very very hard time with this and all i do is get really sad,then really mad. I keep going back and forth with these feelings.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:49 AM on Jul. 20, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (6)
  • have a good cry. Then tell yourself I am happy. Find a couple of special thoughts, of things that make you smile. Whenever you start to think of him, immediately put him out of your mind by things these other thoughts. Again, several times a day tell yourself you are happy (smile when you say it). Pick up a book, or a puzzle, or something so your mind is occupied. tell yourself how wonderful you are, and list all of your qualities. As you tell yourself all of these things, your brain will believe them, and soon you will be happy. Good Luck. You may miss him or think of him for years to come, but it will be with wistfulness.
    moneymagnetmom

    Answer by moneymagnetmom at 4:55 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • i feel ya on that one. at first its not going to be easy. try to keep urself busy to keep ur mind off of it. i listen to alot of music..its like therapy. be with friends and family that can cheer you up. do things to make yourself happy!! spoil urself a little bit. dont blame urself or wonder what you did wrong. something better lie ahead. one day ull find the right one and all this heartache will make sense. hope this helped and u can vent to me if you want :D peace love and positive thoughts. :D E.
    ebrittian22

    Answer by ebrittian22 at 3:05 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Time. I have found that only time truly heals this kind of hurt, There are things you can do in the meantime though, I like to read, so shopping, go to church, I pray a lot. I recently realized that the last relationship I had just isn't going to work out. What hurts the most though is when real, true feelings are involved. It hurts like heck, but it will ease. It's been two weeks and a day since I last saw him, and it is getting easier, but take your time before you start up another relationship. It's good to have some time to yourself! Good luck!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:21 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • It might be helpful for you to sit down and make a list of all the negative things about the other person. Nobody is perfect, and it just could be that he had more negatives than positives. So write it all down, look at it, and see if perhaps there was really more bad about this than there was good. Don't forget to write down things like "he wasn't 100% devoted to me," "he had problems being a one-woman man," or "he had a bad history with other women." Don't overlook anything that would have meant your life with him would have been very stressful. Then make another list of what you really want in a man, and then determine to wait until that guy finds you and not to settle for anything less or for anyone who does not meet your criteria. Determine to be happy alone. Then when the right man finds you, you will be able to be happy with him, because you will know it is right.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:57 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • These feelings are here for you to learn from. They are life experiences that will help you later on. Embrace your emotions, letting them fly is the best way to heal. If you bottle it up, then you might get resentful & could be overly paranoid when starting your next relationship. Just hang in there, everything passes & once you are over it, you'll be a better person because of it. Sorry that you have a broken heart :( Maybe a lil personal vacation would be good. Help clear your mind by the ocean.

    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 10:49 AM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Then use what you learned from this one to plan for the next one with the right guy. It's all good. We learn from every experience we have. Some are great and some are disappointments but you can't stay stuck. If you do then you are cheating yourself out of the opportunity to find the right guy and work on the relationship that WILL work the way you want it to. It's like you are a student and you liked your teacher (maybe way too much) but school is out and you have to take a break and go back to school again and find your next teacher. It's all my young one. Broken hearts do hurt but time will heal it. Meanwhile, saddle up and get ready to ride out and find another adventure. Life is full of adventures. Accept them, enjoy them. Keep looking forward bc looking back will only slow you down.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:07 PM on Jul. 20, 2009