• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

y is it so wrong???

y does everyone think its so wrong that minors get married and get pregnant.
im 16 i got married in feb and im ttc. al least im not 16 not married and single and pregnant. im just trying to start my life early. i dont c y everyone has to judge me cause my age. did i metion me and my husband own 2 houses. y is it so wrong that i have a child?

 
Wytegirl

Asked by Wytegirl at 8:20 PM on Jul. 20, 2009 in Trying to Conceive

Level 1 (0 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • I was a teen mom (got prego at 17, had her at 18). I was a lot more mature than most of my peers, so I took on the mommy role with ease, was married and in my own apartment before my daughter was a year old. My (now ex--trust me it doesn't always last!) husband was in the military...national guard as well to be exact. The Nat'l guard doesn't pay SQUAT unless you're deployed. You don't even get health benefits unless he's on orders for over 30 days, so I hope your hubby has a good day job.

    I do not regret having my daughter. I was NEVER into the party scene, and even now, I still hardly drink. But I do wish I would have waited. It's not that we see it as wrong, it's that some of us have been there, and want other young women like yourself to have better than what we did. To be able to enjoy YOURSELF before you dedicate your life to a tiny, helpless little blessing. You're only 16...you have MANY years ahead of you!
    milfalicious08

    Answer by milfalicious08 at 2:03 AM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • Why are you going to start drama? You've already made up your mind. So it doesn't really matter what anyone thinks.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:27 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Okay...first of all, lose the chatspeak. You will get much more respect and positive responses if we can understand what you're saying without the text speak. Now, having said that, I will say that I totally disagree with your choices, but this is a free country. YOu are entitled to your thoughts and actions, just as long as you can live with them. At sixteen, youre BODY is not even fully grown. Your brain and the chemicals associated with it are not fully grown. How is it okay to put your body through an adult process when youre not an adult? My daughter is 15 and she is still growing taller and developing. Shes extremely mature for her age, but even she knows that would be nuts. I am not saying you cant be a good mother, not at all. I am saying, however, that you have the rest of your life to do this. Be a kid, go out, do fun stuff, go to school, get a college degree, go to six flags, have fun. Dont grow up so fast!
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 8:28 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • I don't think everyone sees it as being "wrong" to start your life so early, it's just that those of us whom are older and wiser know the road you're headed down. Owning 2 homes doesn't make a difference..it doesn't make your marriage last longer or your children happier. Those of us who are out of our teens know the reality of the world out there, and we know that unless you continue your education you'll be stuck in a lose-lose situation some day. Please finish your education, get a job, and learn from the mistakes you are sure to make. We all do. Even us old fogies have made plenty. Your youth is such a wonderful thing. Enjoy it while you can, because the adult responsibilities will hit much too soon. God Bless and Good Luck with you and your family.
    lighthousemom3

    Answer by lighthousemom3 at 8:29 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Most teenagers arent mature enough to be in a serious relationship, let alone rise to the extreme responsibility of being a parent.

    Most take being young for granted and miss out on so many things that they regret later on.
    Cherrie522

    Answer by Cherrie522 at 8:29 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • probably because at 16 you are still a teenager not an adult. really your still a child in most peoples eyes. when i was 16 i could never imagine being pregnant or having a baby. im sure u will get questioned about how old your husband is and why your parents would let u get married.
    kd2kds

    Answer by kd2kds at 8:29 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Sweetie you sound like you know what your doing. It is your choice not some judemental freaks or the few randoms that agree with you. I wish I got married first, but thats ok my life is fine. I don't have a prob with it and even if I did to each its own. However know it will be hard. Good Luck sweetie I hope it works out.
    hot-mama86

    Answer by hot-mama86 at 8:35 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • my parents didnt want me. i do have a job and i have a great marriage my husband had just recently joind the national guard. i have a good life i already grew so people can stop talking about how hard it is to have a child i raised my newphew. from when he was born until he turned 5 i now about motherhood. i had to grow up and raise my self as a child my parents were drunks.
    Wytegirl

    Answer by Wytegirl at 8:36 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Okay, I will give you my experience. I am 20..had my baby when I was 19 but got pregnant at 18. This was unplanned obviously. I LOVE my daughter to death!! but...my life would be easier if I was married and financially ready before having a child. I wish that I could still go out and have as much fun as possible. You are so limited when you have a baby. So, my advice..just think about the sacrifices you will be making. Yeah, you may be married BUT you are very young. ENJOY LIFE I am serious bc once you have that baby....an easy life is gone.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:45 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • so then maybe you should take a break and try being a kid for a little while before you go into baby making mode. people naturally live a lot longer now a days, we aren't dying off in our thirties, and we don't NEED to procreate just to replenish the population. that was mostly why people did have babies earlier on in the past. but it just isnt like that anymore.
    who cares if you own two houses? are they paid off? doubtful, so i actually feel sorry for you.
    yea it sounds like your childhood may have been a disaster so you got some security now and you want to move fast and start a family... thats not the answer, and its not going to make your life perfect. and/or complete.
    you should try to enjoy and experience some life, like your 18th or your21st w/o babies. and know that when times comes later your house is paid off and your relationship is strong, and you know who you are more. dont knock the fogies wisdom. ...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:46 PM on Jul. 20, 2009