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Need help fast please!!!

Emma (15m) is going through separation anxiety and while it started a couple weeks ago, its being heightened by the fact that we started putting her to bed and naps while she was awake. She took it fairly decently at first (for a baby who could scream for two hours straight on a car ride) but now she's absolutely panicked. She's screaming right now. The reason we started this is because us putting her down resulted in her rolling around, poking us in the eye and generally doing everything to stay awake. When it became obvious that we were more of a hinderance than help, we just put her in her crib after her nap and bedtime routine...plus I could do this guilt free knowing that this was for the best. But nots its just exasperated her anxiety. I cannot be the only person with this problem but I can't find anything about actually putting the baby to bed with regard to separation anxiety. Help please! She's so upset!

Answer Question
 
mrs_pulley

Asked by mrs_pulley at 8:45 PM on Jul. 20, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 8 (251 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • go in and check on her every few mins. Separation anxiety and not wanting to go to sleep are very different things. My DD has separation anxiety but when we put her down she cries for a few then she is out. It will take about a week of doing this to get her to understand that this now our new routine. You are not the only mom to go through this, I promise. When we did it it was the hardest week of my life but the most rewarding in the long run as well. I wish you luck.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 8:53 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Consistency is key, though it may take a while to find what works for your DD. My son has started a little with the separation anxiety b/c I started working, and he screams now too. But I only go in once, to show him I'm still close by, and that is only if he is still full-out screaming after about 10 min. I go in, pick him up, kiss him and calm him down a little, and then put him back down. Some people say that you shouldn't even pick them up, just try calming with your voice, but this is what works for my son. By the time I close his bedroom door and make it down the hall, he is quiet.
    kikikiki

    Answer by kikikiki at 9:00 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • Super Nanny would be a great start. She has a book out and i watch her show all the time. That woman could put an elephant down for a nap without a problem....lol

    Good Luck.
    lighthousemom3

    Answer by lighthousemom3 at 9:01 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • I don't think its separation anxiety. I think her nervous system is not mature enough to relax herself to sleep.

    My son's 10 month old baby would only fall asleep if he held him in his lap and held his arms and legs and let him scream for 30 minutes. They were living with me and my DIL started working and I started taking care of my grandbaby some. He was a 9 on the 0-10 screaming baby scale.

    I couldn't let him scream himself to sleep. I figured out he could fall asleep watching James Blunt videos on YouTube. He has branched out to James Taylor and some other soft rock. He sits on my lap and sways back and forth when the crowd does and claps. When he is just about asleep he will still clap. He will fall asleep with no crying. When my son saw it he couldn't believe it.

    You might try chiropractic, massage, yoga. Yes with a 15 month old.


    GailllAZ

    Answer by GailllAZ at 9:06 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • You could try some soft music, they make cd's for children bed times. My farorites are the ocean sounds with the piano but those are for me :) I would have to say it is not seperation anx, more like why me? Try reading a book. Don't underestimate your child either. I have a few memories from before I could talk. I understood people just fine but I couldn't respond or walk for that matter. Try asking your child what will help them and offer options. Do you want mommy to read you a story? Do you want a stuffed bear? How about your blankie? Also, maybe a brighter night light.
    brittneysmom31

    Answer by brittneysmom31 at 3:36 AM on Jul. 21, 2009

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