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I need help!!

I have been breastfeeding my son since the day he was born and he is now 14 months old and I really want to wean him, but I don't want to make it traumatic on him or to be cruel to him in any way by taking it away. I just want it to go as smoothly as possible but I have no idea where to even begin to start the process. I am with him like 24-7 and have only been away from him for a few hours at a time but I am wanting to go to Kings Island in 3 weeks but I would be away from him for an entire day and I have never been apart from him for that long and I just don't know if I can do it. He eats all kinds of stuff and drinks whole milk so its not like he would starve it's more the separation and comfort......and it's all he has ever known. I just don't know how to ease into letting go and making all these changes I guess. Any advice or tips would be very useful and appreciated.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:19 PM on Jul. 20, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • I think it sounds like it is harder on you than it probably is on your baby. I would say you should start leaving him more often any chance you get where hubby can keep him while you make trips to grocery ect.. over the next couple weeks and get him more used to being away from you a little. Try and space out the nursing as far as you can and don't give in to him every time he cries, just say no and give him a cup of milk. Then nurse him when you feel he really needs it so it's not just a comfort thing. If you leave him for short periods of time he will soon learn that mommy always comes back and his anxiety will soon pass. But the more you cling to him the more he will in return so you have to let go a little to help him through the changes also. Good luck!

    Answer by littleguys_rule at 11:26 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • well as for comfort why dont you get him something like a special lil blanket or a small stuffed animal and you sleep with it for a week or so to get your scent on it and then give it to him to sleep with or carry it where ever/ tell hi it is special.

    Answer by rosepetalluv at 11:28 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • It sounds like you aren't ready to go. And that's fine. You don't have to. You don't have to wean either. It's a change that takes something away from the child, so of course it will be hard on him.

    Read up on child led weaning and the benefits of nursing into toddlerhood. Don't put so much stress or effort into leaving him or weaning. He's only young once.

    Answer by jus1jess at 11:46 PM on Jul. 20, 2009

  • kellymom is a great website

    If you don't have to go back to work full time it would be much better for you and your baby. You still have a symbiotic relationship.

    Much depends on who will care for him. If his father or a well known family member will care for him it will be easier but it may still be traumatic at first. Weaning would be the worst thing to do. To go to work and take away breastfeeding would be very difficult.

    Maybe you could do childcare from your home or go to someone else's home. I would care for rich people's kids when mine were small so I wouldn't have to work.


    Answer by GailllAZ at 12:29 AM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • I know how you feel, I've been there. Your baby will be fine, even if you're not around. In fact it's easier for your baby, cuz he can't smell the mama milk and s he'll not demand it. I was worried too, cuz I still b-fed mine and he's 18 month. But now I started to wean him. At the beginning I was taking the feeding away for nap time and then 2 weeks later, it was the bed time feeding and the night feeding. Now, he's off the mama milk and almost sleeps completely through the night. We have now other rituals to go to sleep like reading several short books, singing twinkle twinkle little star together and we just cuddle. I still could b-fed him, but he don't even demands it anymore.

    Good luck Mama!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:34 AM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • I agree with PP about while you are away from home. Also, Children form attachments and habits around 18-24 months. So if it is BF , bottle, special blanket, pacifier whatever. Try to get out of the habit before it becomes an addition type habbit instead of a nessessity. I BF my son for nutrition, but once he could get that on his own from solids ,whole milk and other I stopped the BF. You will always have an amazing bond with him. the BF was just to be a healthy start. If he is already drinking milk then start using a sippy more often through out the day. Skip a BF'ing during the day at first for a while, then start skipping a evening BF'ing. Your body will take time to catch on to the new schedule too. Do it slowly and your body will slowly make less milk . So you and your son can wean together. GL

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:53 AM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • i weaned my dd by cutting out feeding through out the when i was at work i wouldnt pump so the only time she at was when i was home at night and then everntually i cut back on that to its easier if ur not in the house when its his feeding time idk y but i found if i was in the house at my dd feeding time my boobs aches if iwas at the barn my boobs wouldnt hurt intill i walked in the door

    Answer by rainmommy at 10:37 AM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • I weaned my son by breast feeding less!! Just feeding him in the morning and at night. Then during the day i would give him a pediasure just to fill his belly and it tasted good!! Your son is at an age now that he have other things to drink during the day :) I just don't know if you'll be able to do it in three weeks...I'm not sure exactly how long it took my son to wean, we weren't on a time schedule. Don't stress out about it your baby will since that!! It's easier if you know he is ready to be done nursing :)

    Answer by livin4jc at 2:38 PM on Jul. 21, 2009

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