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Does your man leave when he's mad to 'vent'?

When my husband & I get into an argument (which is rare) he usually resides to leaving the house in a heated moment without saying where he is going or when he'll be back. And won't answer the cell. I hate this! It makes me feel sooo sad! He knows and does it to push my buttons(I suppose) Like I said, this doesn't happen often, and I'm not at ALL worried of him cheating (I know he is very faithful, etc.) He says that he leaves the house if we argue or if he is REALLY stressed (and we ARE right now) to have alone time and to avoid saying anything he would regret later, etc.. and that he just is getting away to vent.. That it's his way of dealing. Do your significant others do this? I'm just sitting here sad and lonely cause he left about 2 hours ago and I hate it!!! (BTW, he has never stayed gone for more than a few hours) Any others that deal with this? Any comforting thoughts? For some reason I am a baby everytime!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:14 PM on Jul. 21, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • My husband leaves without saying a word too but he usually answers his phone. He says the same about leaving to cool off so that we don't say things that we might regret later. I'm always the one sitting at home crying too. It sucks because I never walk away from him but I have accepted that that's just how he deals with things. try talking to him (when you are both calm)about how it makes you feel to have him just leave like that. I hate that anyone goes through that but I am amazed at how many women go through the same thing. Hope everything is ok and your hubby realizes how much it hurts when he does that.
    Mommy0425

    Answer by Mommy0425 at 11:02 PM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • my hubby is the same way. i used to try to keep him from leaving because he would be gone for so long without a word of where he is or when he'll be back. it would piss me off and i would stress myself out thinking of how he refused to stay while i begged. after a while, i gave up and would just let him leave. i stopped chasing after him, stopped calling, and when he'd get back, i wouldn't say a word. he'd see me emotionless & would apologize. i guess in the end it works out better because we do say a lot of hateful things in our moments of anger. but it sure does give me another reason to be pissed off with him, which is why i always win. =P
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • Mine does it too, when the agrument is getting niether of us anywhere and it only gets worse. But he does answer the phone when i call. I usually know where he's going, even though he doesn't say. I also give him about a half hour to calm down. I like it when he leaves it stops us from saying things we don't mean. You get to think in peace and we always come to terms when he comes back. Men are just different in handling thier emotions. He needs time to himself. Its ok with me. This isn't very often though, but yes we have been there. You just have to figure out what went wrong while he's gone. Thats what i do. Then if its not worth fighting over just say sorry. Sometimes we can argue over the dumbest things.lol. I just say sorry, he says sorry too and we're good.
    Iluvmygirlies42

    Answer by Iluvmygirlies42 at 4:22 PM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • He will come back you know some people need there space to cool off.

    Put your right hand on your left shoulder and left hand on your right shoulder and squeeze there's a hug from me to you. He loves you and your family, he just needs his space. He will be back soon and maybe you can tell him how you feel. I really hope i helped you feel better.
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 4:29 PM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • He used to before the children came and I hated it so much! Now we work things out without huge fights. If we have an argument or disagreement on something we talk it out the best we can. If worst comes to worst one of us is moody for a day or two but it quickly passes.

    lucysmomrocks

    Answer by lucysmomrocks at 4:50 PM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • My hubby does this too. Just recently we got into a huge fight and he left and I chased after him. If I wouldn't have chased after him he would have left for a very long time and I wouldn't have heard from him at all.
    kimosgirl08

    Answer by kimosgirl08 at 4:56 PM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • My SO does this too. In fact he did it just the other night. I also hate when he does this because this last time he didn't come home until the next day and I was worried out of my mind! I'm planning on sitting him down and talking to him because I don't think it is healthy for us if he continues to walk away but in a way I guess your husband is right. Better to go somewhere and cool off then say a bunch of things you'll regret.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:59 PM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • he use too and that would be his excuse to go out with his friends and staying out late, but when he comes home we would be at it again becuz of that . Now he just goes into the room or just outside
    funmommy123

    Answer by funmommy123 at 5:21 PM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • I am the one to do this if we get into a heated argument. I don't want to be around him at the moment. I usually drive around for a while and cool off. He will call me after a while and ask me to come home. I always do and we discuss things more calmly and try to come to a compromise, or one will just give in to the other. Usually he gives in to me.....lol.
    dddd2776

    Answer by dddd2776 at 5:41 PM on Jul. 21, 2009

  • yup, he won't say a word when he's angry. He just walks out and I have no clue when or if he'll ever come back. He just won't fight. (passive aggressive) but he'll get even with me when he does come back! lol
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:43 PM on Jul. 21, 2009