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Verbal, emotional abuse of mother by 21yo. live in.

I can not take it any more. I don't feel that my DH is supporting the way I feel. DD has him convenced (DF) that if she leaves any other way, but by her own choice, that she may never return. I am at the point that I do not care.

I have to leave my home because I am at the point that all her drama/stress level is phyically causeing me chest pains when I breath.

The only friend I can stay with has her own issues right now.

I guess what I am asking is,
Is there anywhere I can go to get some rest and not be desturbed for a few days?
I only have 20$s.

Hospital? what grounds do I use?
Womans shelter? is it possible to stay there for a Mental calming?

I do not want to fix the situation right now. Right now I need some rest.

Please limit your advice to where I might go to get some rest.
Thank you.


Asked by MamasTooOld at 7:11 AM on Jul. 22, 2009 in Relationships

Level 4 (28 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • Wow, people are rude, if you had read the post, she says that her DH is the one enabling. And as I assume both of their names are on their dwellings legal documents, he gets a say!

    Hugs! You can, in some instances, go to a mental health facility if you live in a small enough community(bigger cities are usually full with critical cases). Seriously, most have a 24 hour crisis intervention unit and if you are having health problems due to this situation, then you most likely qualify. Because you are having a breakdown, whether you want to admit it or not. Check it out. They can also follow up with you and what's going on at home and they might be able to help resolve the situation. Even if they can't help you for the 24 hour period, they can recommend where to go for help so you can what you need.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:31 AM on Jul. 22, 2009

  • Why are you leaving your own home. Kick her ass out. She's 21, time she moved on. Your an enabler to her dysfunctional ways. Your not doing her any favors, in fact your holding her back.


    Answer by zbee at 7:35 AM on Jul. 22, 2009

  • Motel is your only option... sorry. don't really know of anywhere else for you to go. if u go to your friends house, can't u just stay in the garage or somewhere out of sight from her? hid in one of her rooms and don't come out...

    Answer by mschanng at 7:38 AM on Jul. 22, 2009

  • I would kick her out, & if she said she is NEVER comign back i would tell her "THANK GOD!"

    Yes, you are an enabler. You are hurting her by not kicking her out. You are allowing her to be a mooch, & you are allowing her to not get on her own 2 feet. You need to get ehr out of there asap. She is an adult, even if she has no where to go, she will be fine. She will fine somewhere to go though. Stop enabling her.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:13 AM on Jul. 22, 2009

  • got a tent? If so, go to a campground. It's cheaper than a motel and has showers. If not, there are some walmarts that allow campers to park in their parking lot. (I forgot what it's called so you could look up and see which ones do it but drive by Walmart and see if they have rv's in the parking area away from the main entrance). Of course you'd have to sleep in the car unless you made friends with an rv person but it would be safe. I used to have to flee my abusive husband and didn't have much money. I'd take the kids and we'd spend the night in the parking lot of some store open 24 hrs. One time we stayed at Krispy Kreme parking lot watching them make donuts. I told them it was a field trip! lol Good luck on this but when you are ready tell your dd that is YOUR home and her behavior in it is unacceptable and to speed up the marriage plans bc she's no longer welcome in your home and needs her own.

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:32 AM on Jul. 22, 2009

  • I feel for you sweetheart!! I had my step-daughter live with me for a year when her Dad and I split up. I finally had enough and kicked her out. I know it sounds harsh but I had to put myself first for once. It was really hard on me and I cried but when she was gone I actually felt relief!!
    Keep your chin up!! But don't let her run you out of your own house she is 21. She should be out on her own anyways!!
    Good luck.....and remember we are all here for you!

    Answer by newlifewith3 at 9:35 AM on Jul. 22, 2009

  • actually, you can check a womens shelter. Whether you can stay there or not, they can usually make suggestions for you problems. I'd give them a call.

    Answer by LadyAronna at 11:41 AM on Jul. 22, 2009

  • Thank you miss anon. for coming to my rescue.  I was really becoming down trodden. I understand that Each of You gave me what you thought was heart felt response and I do appreciate it. Honestly.  The tent idea is great but it's thunder-storming here for the next three whole days. I use to go fishing to relax myself. no more. love you signthere's no peace in my head, for there to be peace found. I called my Dr. left a message that I've noticed in the last few days that I find it difficult to breath and that my chest was actually beginning to hurt. Maybe something will come of it. I was on the phone last week begging for some nerve pills.


    Answer by MamasTooOld at 1:39 PM on Jul. 22, 2009

  • Mammas to old, In no way was I being rude to you. My anger(not rudeness) was directed at your DD for abusing you to the point that you have chest pains and want to leave your own home because of her. I told you what I would do, but the fact your dh is not even backing you up is even more devastating. I know there are shelters out there for you if that's what you choose, but I sure would be kicking their asses out. As for you pitching a tent in a public parking lot is not the thing to do with all there is going on out there. Good luck hon and I wish you the best.


    Answer by zbee at 11:47 AM on Jul. 23, 2009