Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

SO HELP!!!

my So promised me that he would stop going to the bar the last couple weeks just in case i do go into labor he isnt buzzed or drunk. but he still is going and last monday i called him on it, he said he drinks with his friends and if he only has a couple then whats the big deal? but i got mad beacsue for one he broke his promise. and i told him that if he drinks i dont want him near me during labor if he is drunk? Am i wrong to be mad, (fyi he just texted me telling me that he was going to the bar AGAIN)

Answer Question
 
newmom092009

Asked by newmom092009 at 8:14 PM on Jul. 23, 2009 in Relationships

Level 6 (114 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • not your not wrong for being mad. I would tell him that you wont let him in the room after you have the baby also maybe that might get him thinking
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:15 PM on Jul. 23, 2009

  • If it is only a couple drinks... no big deal. If he is drunk then tell him this behavior cannot continue around the baby. Sounds as if there is way more to this story then you are telling. He has a bad habit. It is time to grow up with a new baby on the way.
    oliviahank

    Answer by oliviahank at 8:16 PM on Jul. 23, 2009

  • I feel for you, I had to put up with that behavior with my ex, same scenrio with me pregnant, like i said EX When are men going to learn, to grow up. My hubby does not go to bars and act that way. You need to give him an ultimatem, I would not tolerate that behavior,
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:20 PM on Jul. 23, 2009

  • Why is he going to bars so often anyway?? It's one thing to have an occasional night at the bar, but drinking is expensive....he has a wife waiting for him at home.....and he's about to become a father... time to grow up and be responsible.

    Again, my husband goes out for a boys night out every now and then, but not several nights a week, and he sure wouldn't have done that when I was due to have a baby.....he was home with me.... excited, getting the nursery ready, helping me get the house ready so it would be easy when I got home...walking me, and spending some of our last "couple time" together.

    If I had another way to the hospital, I'm not sure he'd even know I was in labor!!
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 8:30 PM on Jul. 23, 2009

  • honey stayed in that type of relation ship for way too ling.i know you love him but he will never change. better to get out know. i know it is scary (i had 4 kids) but when the booze is more important there is a major problem. sorry honey but he will never change no matter how hard you beg.
    UNLUCKYATLOVE

    Answer by UNLUCKYATLOVE at 8:32 PM on Jul. 23, 2009

  • Relationships are about respect trust and partnership. First off, if something really bothers you (or him) and the other partner isnt doing something to change the situation, then they arent respecting each other. This is obviously important to you, it doesnt matter if its logical or not, if he loved you he would respect you enough to honor your request. By going out when you asked him not to he is violating your trust, and how can you expect him to be trustworthy while you are in labor if he is drunk. He will not be able to help you and support you. A partnership is about working together. Sometimes we have to sacrifice things we like bc they arent what is best for our partners, families or lives. I like traveling a LOT. But common sense tells me that with two small children I need stability. I give up what I want bc it isnt whats best for the ones I love. And if he truly loves you he will too.
    NightOwlMama

    Answer by NightOwlMama at 10:04 PM on Jul. 23, 2009

  • i lived with one of them except he drank at home so i had to deal with a child and a drunk...i finally kicked his ass to the curb when my hubby said he wait for me to do the right thing it took me two years but i did it and i dont regrett it i just tell girls that r in the situation that i was in just to take the kids and run b/c they will never gorw up and they will never be responsiable. my ex still picks drinking and spending time with his buddies over his dd he'll call me and say i have no food inthe house fo dd so i'll take some over wheni drop her off and in the frig is a case of beer not even cold yet....those weekend i useally end up bring dd back home with me
    rainmommy

    Answer by rainmommy at 10:33 PM on Jul. 23, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN