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"Sorry but my daughters health is more imprtant than your childs feelings!!!" (something that happened at the store yesterday -- had this mom SCREAMING at me and my daughters g'ma,please tell me i had good reason!!)

Im pushing the baby in the buggy at Wal-Mart and her dad is in the asile,and his mom is walking next to the cart.We stop for her to get something off the shelf she needed.Then this boy (who has d/s) was talking to my daughter,which i didnt mind.But i noticed as he was talking he was spitting,so i started to move.Than he grabbed her binkie,the end that goes in her mouth.Than i said we need to go,and he tried to give it back to her,i grabbed it and said 'no she doesnt need it right now'.And he kept forcing so i snatched it and said 'it needs washed!'and he started screaming when we walked away.And his mom came around and asked what had happened and he told her.She came at us (my babys g'ma was pulling the buggy away and i was holding the other end)and said we hurt his feelings,and i told her about the spitting and the binkie,and that i wasnt being rude but my daughters health is more important than his feelings. CONT

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:39 AM on Jul. 24, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (44)
  • and she said he wasnt hurting her. well i know that, but even if i touch the part of the binkie that goes in her mouth i wash it. and i DEFINATELY would for a stranger. she said he has d/s its ok. ummm ... we dont know him , so no its not ok ... and she just started yelling at me for that! HONESTLY ... HES A STRANGER!!! i dont want strangers touching my child!!!

    isnt a stranger touching your child or something going in your childs mouth , or that strangers spitting on your child , a good reason to push that buggy out the asile?! she said i was rude for not letting him touch the baby or play w/ her or HOLD her! WTF?!

    so i should just let ANY strangers hold my baby?! i dont care what disability you have , i said it nice the 1st 2 times , after that me and her g'ma got angry and moved the buggy.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:42 AM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • Personally, if I was in this situation, I would have told the mother that you needed to go but that her son had your child's pacy and ask her if she could help you get it back. The mom probably would have known how to get it back without hurting her son's feelings and I am sure she probably would have apologized as well.


    Answer by JeremysMom at 9:44 AM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • cont'? you had reason for concern, the other mom just probably felt that you were responding really to her son's down syndrome not that he took baby's binkie. Just get a few binkies and keep them on hand to easily replace what's lost or dropped. The boy was smart knowing the binkie needed to be washed. But again his mom probably thought you didin't like her down syndrome son near you.

    No big deal. Move on.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:44 AM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • I don't think you were wrong. You weren't rude and she is using his d/s as an excuse for his behavior. She shouldn't treat him any less than a child who does not have d/s. She needs to teach him right and wrong and not just talk to anyone and let him just touch anyone or their things.


    Answer by Anonymous at 9:45 AM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • Why do you have your undies in a bunch over a stranger? There are more important things in the universe to worry about.

    Answer by rkoloms at 9:45 AM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • Answered at 9:44 AM on Jul. 24, 2009 by: Anonymous
    Well he didnt know it needed to be washed. I told him it did, he tried to put it in her mouth after he had touched the nipple part...I do keep like 3 in my purse,but they're the soothie ones so when they fall the bounce for miles! LOL so we have lost sooo many at home OMG! so everyone is important to us lol. I did throw that one away , bc his hands were FILTHY and the family did have an odor (not being rude but standing so close , u notice it) ... so i threw it out bc i didnt even want it in my purse after that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:47 AM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • i'm sure that the other mother has had her share of looks, stares and rude comments
    take that into consideration
    it was not you
    it was her past experiences

    i did like the answer that said ask the mom to get the pacifer back, that would have been a good solution and the boy could have learned something about taking things friom babies etc-from his mom(but hind sight is 20/20)

    don't worry about it

    Answer by boredmom44 at 9:49 AM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • I understand where you are coming from, I wouldnt want anyone, child or adult to touch my child's paci./

    But I also know (as a mother of a child with a disability) that you are extremely sensitive to how others react to your child.....she may have just been very sensitive and overprotective of her own child.

    She was wrong too b/c she should have just told you sorry for my son bothering you and delt with her son on her own....but I can understand her being oversensitive too....

    Sorry this happened.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:50 AM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • anony845 some children with disabilities just don't respond the way children w/o disabilities do. It does matter that this child had a disability I think because the mom clearly has to deal with people more routinely, proven in society, looking and chattering about her son's looks and such.

    No one knows what situation we're in except ourselves. But certainly someone with 'obvious' compromised ability for any reason has more sensitive feelings and their caregiver does too than coming across someone without an obvious difference.


    Answer by Anonymous at 9:50 AM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • first of all i would of done the same thing and i HAVE so do not feel bad at all i was at the store and some kids took my daughter sippy cup and spit on it then tryed to give it back to her i took it from him his mother came up and yelled at me saying how dare you take something away from my son i told her you need to raise your son better then and not have him spit on stuff
    so dont worry hon

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:52 AM on Jul. 24, 2009

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