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Pick up rocks

My 12 year old Granddaughter got into an argument with her 7 year old half sister,they were calling each other names, the 12 year old grabbed the younger one by the arms and shook her,the 12 year olds step father saw her,and came out and made the younger one go in,got to watch TV,this was at 5:00 in afternoon,she had to stay out until 10:08 she said picking ip small rocks in their yard,they have a lot of rocks.I do not think this is acceptable.Any comments or help would be great

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:56 PM on Jul. 24, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (9)
  • That is completely ridiculus. I can see making her pull weeds or even pick up rocks but not for five hours. That boarders on the edge of abuse.
    bugandsmiles

    Answer by bugandsmiles at 1:01 PM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • i think it was a great idea, just cause they have all the rocks doesnt mean anything he did say every last one.. She is 12yrs old, she should know not to be shacking ppl like that.. at 10pm it has just gotton good and dark and its not like its freezing outside, busting and time out doesnt work anymore i say he did a good thing..
    ArlieBeeMee

    Answer by ArlieBeeMee at 1:01 PM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • husband threatens to send 12 and 9 yr old out side to put up rocks and move to other side of the yard and then move back
    but he has never followed through
    just lets kids know that they are skating on thin ice

    5 hours of that...way too long. this info came from child right? what did the adult say?
    sometimes 5 hours to a child was really 20 minutes
    get the whole story
    boredmom44

    Answer by boredmom44 at 1:04 PM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • I could see for 30 minutes, but not 5 hours. I would see nothing wrong with around 30 minutes. I would also talk to an adult and get the whole story, some kids exaggarate.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 4:02 PM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • Bet she doesn't do it again!
    I do think ten is a little late. Maybe til Sundown and then all day the next day!
    Starfire73

    Answer by Starfire73 at 11:12 PM on Jul. 24, 2009

  • Sometimes I think there should be an entire section on step families! What might be okay for a natural family where all things are equal, is not necessarily okay for a stepfamily where there are already lots of issues built into the package. 12 is older than 7, but they are both kids...kids do fight.....I would have to know a lot more about the history of this family and these kids, but i am getting the feeling that step-father may have been overly harsh and "territorial" when dealing with these two children. Do they fight a lot? Does the younger one manipulate in order to see the step sister get into trouble and make herself feel special with her REAL father...things like that! Where was the mother...I think the punishment was extremely harsh and very"cold". A real power-play on the part of the step father, not really geared to address the issue, but to show who is boss andwhat will happen if you mess with his daughter! yuck
    BJoan

    Answer by BJoan at 9:43 AM on Jul. 25, 2009

  • It seems like a bizarre punishment. I'm not sure what lesson she was supposed to learn. With that said, giving a child chores (be it picking up rocks or dishes) is perfectly acceptable, though 5 hours seems a bit excessive. Was this punishment an isolated incident or are harsh punishments frequent with the step dad and the 12 yo? If so, you may want to address it somehow, sisters fight so it will happen again or the 7 yo may be manipulating the situation.
    CoolGirlChris

    Answer by CoolGirlChris at 11:47 PM on Jul. 25, 2009

  • OK, dh brought up a REALLY good point. What if your gdaughter spent time playing or refusing to pick up the rocks. And she ended up out there until she did as she was told. I mean, you are hearing this from her without hearing the other side, so don't judge until you hear it. If it is a case of she was being rebellious and refusing to do as she was told, then I don't see it as extreme. Now if it turns out that she HONESTLY worked for 5 hours straight (which believe it or not I see as hard to believe) then he was way out of line.
    Petie

    Answer by Petie at 12:22 AM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • 5 hours may seem a lttle excessive. But lets look at the bigger picture...did it work? If it did, then you should commending him. Too many times we are not strict enough with our kids.
    bracketrat

    Answer by bracketrat at 2:46 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

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