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I feel like a damn slave!

I have been with DH for 2 years now and things keep going down hill. I feel like im just here to take care of our son and to provide sex when he wants it. Today i asked DH to feed our son so i could take a shower he told me he didnt want to and i said that was fine then all the sudden he says he will feed him. As soon as he starts to feed him he looks at me and tells me that i NEED to do the dishes because he had to wash some to make breakfest. I do the dishes all the time and the laundry. I got pissed but did them anyways. Then i reliazed that he dosnt have a clean uniform for work in the morning. So i started picking up all his laundry around the house since he dosnt know how to use a hamper so i could wash some things for him. I wash his clothes and they sit in the hamper for weeks! We agreed a long time ago that he would put his own clothes away. But he never seems to do it. Then i end up washing clean clothes because....

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:26 PM on Jul. 26, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • slave (slv)
    n.
    1. One bound in servitude as the property of a person or household.(could be a husband, mother/father)
    2. One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence: "I was still the slave of education and prejudice" (Edward Gibbon). (see?? slaves of education...hmmm)
    3. One who works extremely hard.(in this case the OP)

    I don't see where her use of the term slave is racist or offensive as the definiton doesn't SPECIFICALLY STATE this applies to african americans only.

    You should do your homework next time so you know what the definition of word you attack someone for using IS before going off on someone like this woman who is just venting and looking for advice!
    CinderAmethyst

    Answer by CinderAmethyst at 3:48 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • he dosnt know what is clean or not. On the weekend i think that he should help me around the hosue and with our son but he dosnt do it! Im at a loss on what to do. I have tried not washing his clothes but then he will just wear dirty ones and i have tried not doing everything he tells me to do but then he just gets all pissed off at me. And then it makes me feel like shit. We are trying to plan for us to go see my parents because they have not seen our son yet but i dont think that is going to happen either. Its been 2 weeks since we dicided that we are going to go but he still has not put his leave fourm togeather. I did it today because he is still sleeping form his nap its been 3 hours! Durring that time i have vaccumed swept mopped and done laundry and he wants to have people over tomorrow for a bbq but he has done nothing to get the house ready for one! Ugh please help me!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:30 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • I'm sure you just offended all the African American moms here who had real slaves as ancestors. You may feel used but doubt very seriously if you can identify with a slave. Do you have A/C in your home? Do you have the freedom to leave whenever you want to go shopping or spend money as you wish? Do you have the opportunity to go to a dr or a dentist? Why not thank your dh for what he DOES DO FOR YOU and quit belly aching about what he doesn't do for you? You might get him to help more if you'd appreciate him more. Meanwhile, look up slavery and see exactly what those ppl went through and be ashamed of yourself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:31 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • I know exactly where you are coming from.


    Are you a SAHM?


    Does he work everyday M-F all day?


    If so...be glad you have a roof over ya'lls head, bills bad, a vehicle to go places in...that's is all I can say I know the part when you mentioned about the dh helping out. Next time don't ask tell him Here feed the baby I am going to take a shower....and go with it. when ever you want to do stuff don't ask..tell him that way he can't throw stuff at you in your face or question you. Dh's can be butt's sometimes but they reallly don't know what we MOM's here at go throw while they are out in the world and they act like they have it sooo bad...oh brother give me a break. Just go with it.

    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 3:34 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • i think you need to sit him down and tell him to grow up. u need to have an adult conversation and tell him how it is and that things need to get better or ur goin to have to find a man that loves you and wants to help
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:34 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • mine is the same way
    ranedare

    Answer by ranedare at 3:35 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • Well gee anon thanks for being a bitch! I know what the hell slavery is. And i dont have ac at the moment...if you need to know. And im not complaining about what he dosnt do for me. I know he does alot for me but he does nothing for his son and i have to do EVERYTHING for him. Just about the only thing that i dont do for him is shower him and piss for him.....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:36 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • OP here-
    I am not a sham me and my husband are both in the army. But he feels that i have to do everything. I am a higher rank than him so my pay goes to all the bills and his is more "fun money" but all that goes to is all the fish tanks that he wants. He just got a new one and we already have 6 big ones!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:38 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • Well Anon 3:31 I think that you were a little to harsh on this person and for you wrote this I think you should just don't do nothing and then you will have something to really bitch about when he leaves your drama queen ass.Ok so maybe I am being a little harsh to but ask for help some men need direction not mine but yours may need that kick in the ass to get started.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:42 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • I don't think you sound like a baby at atll. If men want to get married and have families then they need to pitch in and do their part. Yes working and taking care of bills is important but how about just feeding the baby because you love it and want to spend time with them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:43 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

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