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Friends Kids Are Obnoxious I Need Advice?

First off I'm a single mother of one daughter. I work and conserve what I have for her and I. A bottle of juice lasts us a few days her snacks are for a few weeks for camp. My friend has a husband who's not working, And four kids ages 12, 9,7,4. They walk into my house and go into my refriderator and take what they want without asking. Her kids ate all my daughters camp snacks and honestly this happens every single time she comes over. She brings snacks here and there but she doesnt understand that she is a 6 family household and I'm a two. Her kids make a mess without cleaning her 12 year old broke my coffee table by kicking it. I just can't handle this type of behavior in my apartment. Tonite I finally spoke up to the kids and watched there every move. I could tell my friend was annoyed because she tried to shoe the kids off to my daughters room but I made them all sit in front of me in the living room and she got annoyed.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:36 PM on Jul. 26, 2009 in Just for Fun

Answers (9)
  • Your house. You have a right to keep anyone in order while they are there. When they show up, tell the kids to head outside or over to the playground if you have one.
    kscmbz

    Answer by kscmbz at 10:43 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • your house your rules. I expect my kids to be respectful at other people's house and I expect respect at mine.
    pagirl71

    Answer by pagirl71 at 10:45 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • No offense, but stop inviting them over until they can learn some frikkin' manners. NO ONE like the people described above are allowed in my house EVER if they act like that!!
    srhmldndo

    Answer by srhmldndo at 10:51 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • I know it sounds mean to say, but tell her, your house, your rules. Kids play quietly on the floor in the living room, or they stay at home.

    Nicer ways to defuse the situation, is to have a few movies picked out, to let them watch quietly. Be sure to have a box of popcorn in the cupboard, and say, that's what we have, if you want some, it's there, if not, sorry, but that's it. Put the juice and other things away, and have them drink water from the sink. But stay firm in your position, that everything else but what YOU say is available is off limits.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 11:01 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • I do know somewhat how you feel, except it wasn't the kid, but the mother that bothered me. my brother had his son over, and him and my DD do make a mess of things but they are only 19 months old. We try to defuse the situation (the mess) by directing them to the playroom or taking them outside when it's both of them. Well this weekend, my nephew AND his mother stayed the night.. every little thing was my DD's fault according to her, neither her nor my brother helped pick the house back up when the kids went to bed. I was pissed. Before she left in the morning, I pulled her aside and told her flat out... this is my house. You will not speak of my daughter in the way you did earlier, you WILL help clean up the messes made, and you will respect my wishes, or leave.

    She was a bit peeved, but later today, she called to apologize and came back over to help clean up the house.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 11:05 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • Ooooh! That sucks.I am also a single mom with one son and I only shop for him and I and our future needs. How close are you with this friend? Can you let her know? I don't give snacks to any kids unless they are family or a the little neighbor girl that comes over. I too got annoyed once when a new friend back when my son was 5 came over and he straight out opened my fridge and I said "Please don't open my fridge, I don't go to your house and open your fridge", THEN is when he asked me if I had something to drink, I gave him a bottle of water and re-assured him that it is not nice to open other peoples fridges unless they have permission.
    Mamasita98

    Answer by Mamasita98 at 11:06 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • This really is an bad spot to be in and I've been there. You will end up having to have an uncomfortable conversation with the Mom about how you just can't tolerate it anymore. Tell her it's not how you are parenting and you have to deprogram your daughter when they leave and that it's honestly stressful for you. Just tell her.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 11:22 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • It's your house, your rules. When you know your friend is coming over, hide all the snacks in your bedroom, your bedroom is off limits. If you can afford to give them a snack, then just bring out what you want them to have. If your friend gets mad that you don't let her kids destroy your home, then let her take her kids home. She needs to respect you and your home. Of course, having 4 kids come to your house, is going to be different for you, and there will be a few messes, but the kids and their mom should try to pick up most of it before they leave.
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 11:55 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

  • Oh another thing I just thought of...RULE: No kids are allowed to open the fridge!
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 11:56 PM on Jul. 26, 2009

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