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DH and toys

Does anyone have a toy that s/o doesn't know about? We have a bullet he'll agree to use with me only once in a while and never with any enthusiasm. Lately, I've been thinking about buying something larger and more realistic for "me time". I don't keep too many secrets, but given his attitude about the bullet and toys in general, I don't think it's something I want him to know. Anyone else in a relationship have a private B.O.B.?

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:27 AM on Jul. 27, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • i guess im dh loves playing w/ toys.. ( on me not him lol ) i think he gets more xcited when we or i order a new one and it comes in.. just go ahead and get your self the one u want and if your dh sees it or finds it just simple say you dont seem intrested in it so i never told u..( fyi..the one that sticks to almost any surface is fun ie shower,chair. or if u need a job done fast..the rabbit. *wink wink *.. good luck and have fun and i hope dh sees what hes missing out on..

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:36 AM on Jul. 27, 2009

  • No - my dh and I have a huge stockpile of toys that we use, together or separately. I do know that some men are intimidated by toys, so I don't know that I would keep something from him, in case he ever found it and thought that you had it because you were unhappy with him. Have you tried toy shopping with him to see if there's something you might both enjoy? I'm not sure what exact type of bullet you have, but my dh really likes a ring with a bullet in it and he likes an egg inside of me while we have sex - both because he can feel them. There are some other toys as well, but both rings and vibrating eggs are both fairly tame toys that might introduce him to some variety that he might enjoy. But I would be surprised if your dh didn't want you to have something to enjoy yourself with.

    Answer by missanc at 9:37 AM on Jul. 27, 2009

  • I have many of toys but he couldn't care less about what I use so I don't tell him about them. They are not really a secret. He just isn't interested. I have private time with them all the time since SO can't get me off (he knows he can't so neither of us expect it anymore). He has trouble staying hard so he doesn't get to do a lot but we have fun trying. I just use the toys when I need them. (which is often)

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:23 AM on Jul. 27, 2009

  • What you are saying to your husband is that he is not enough of a man for you. I don't know of a man alive who wants to be told that. Whatever you do in secret is likely to be discovered, so I guess you just have to decide whether you want to risk further demasculating your husband. This is a most sensitive area for husbands, and I can't imagine that you would want to make him feel that he alone is incapable of pleasing you. It might do you well to remember that there are plenty of women who would be more than happy with what your husband has to offer.

    Answer by NannyB. at 10:44 AM on Jul. 27, 2009

  • If your husband not happy about it, I wouldn't hide it from him. Your relationship shoudn't have secrets just tell him you have it and if he has a problem then it's his deal or atleast talk about it and work out why he doesn't like that you have it and why you feel you need it. GOod luck to you!

    Answer by Sillylins at 2:31 PM on Jul. 27, 2009

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