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Am I being two faced?

My sister and BIL have been seperated for about 6 months now. My sister is seeing someone else, he's a very nice guy, but I just hope and pray that they can work their marriage out. I love my BIL like he was my real brother, but I want my sister in my life too. So I'm not rude to her boyfriend, and I think it's starting to hurt my BIL's feelings. I feel so stuck in the middle, I wish I knew what to do!!!!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:19 AM on Jul. 28, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • I don't feel that you are being two-faced. You are being diplomatic and courteous. You can care about your BIL and still be kind to your sister's new friend.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 8:30 AM on Jul. 28, 2009

  • I don't think you are! Its perfectly acceptable to try to include her new boyfriend, and still be courteous to your BIL, bc he is still a part of the family too! If either tries to make a big deal out of it, then its their problem, not yours!
    Emuu

    Answer by Emuu at 8:41 AM on Jul. 28, 2009

  • You are not being two faced.. but you are treading on shakey ground.. How does your sister feel about your continued relationship with her ex? Are they still friendsly or is it bitter? Is BIL using you to get back with her, when she OBVIOUSLY doesn't want it? (clue:she's dating other people, not working on the marriage)
    Divorce is hard on the entire family, you accepted him as a brother.. but remember that you should put your sisters feelings before your BIL.
    say_tay

    Answer by say_tay at 8:47 AM on Jul. 28, 2009

  • Your sister needs to get rid of the boyfriend & work on her marriage. If it is nonrepairable, then she needs to take the necessary steps to divorce. When the divorce is final then she can persue the boyfriend.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:59 AM on Jul. 28, 2009

  • no, its not being rude.at all. But your sister has to know who she wants to be with. too. she just cant play them both. it not right.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:26 AM on Jul. 28, 2009

  • The decisions are not yours, so you really can't do anything. Being civil to all people involved is the best thing you can do.
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 10:48 AM on Jul. 28, 2009

  • Be friends with both your sister is your sister, but if things don't work out he is going to have to move on sooner or later try not to be too buddy buddy with him. Be nice of course and if you see or hear things are looking up for your sister then maybe you can tell him it is ok to date and start from there. Or hopefully they both snap out of it in whatever little world they are on and realize hey I had my one and only all along and they come back to each other. GL

    But for now just be there for them and see what happens...GL
    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 11:34 AM on Jul. 28, 2009

  • Be nice to all and don't get too involved.
    Hanapana

    Answer by Hanapana at 2:23 PM on Jul. 28, 2009

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