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Where do we go from here?

Our almost 5 year old son has been to a neurologist, geneticist, developmental pediatrician and a behavioral specialist and not one of them has given me a clear answer as to why my son acts the way he does. He's extremely hyperactive, has an extremely hot/quick temper, is highly aggressive, doesn't listen, habitually lies, hits, screams, punches......i could go on and on. The Behavioral specialist said she can see there are issues with him, but not serious enough to medicate him. The DP said she thinks it's because of inconsistency in discipline...he had an MRI done and it came back normal and all of his blood work came back normal. Somedays I just want to pull my hair out....I'm so frustrated. None of the doctors will just say "He has ___" (fill in the blank) I don't know what to do now. He'll be starting preschool in 4 weeks, so I hope we'll get some answers through the school. Does anyone have any suggestions?


Asked by chenra at 4:55 PM on Jul. 28, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (5)
  • I am going to warn you. there are two kinds of doctors the ones who brush you off and chalk it up to "inconsistent parenting" and the med happy ones who want to drug the life out of them. My son has bipolar, ODD and ADD and it was hell trying to go through the hoops to get him help the thing we found the most helpful was to put him in therapy for starters so that she could A) see if there was any underlying issues we were not aware of and give us all including him the keys to start finding ways to work with and through his anger before it hit the critical point. B)  there was a professional going to bat WITH us and helping us find the right channels after so many melt downs in the office there is no deneying that something needs to be done and that talking alone may not be enough. as a warning one of the best things that worked for us WAS very consistent parenting and discipline with a strict routine


    Answer by knepppi at 11:23 AM on Jul. 29, 2009

  • Have you tried changing his diet? Try eating organic.


    Answer by Anonymous at 4:57 PM on Jul. 28, 2009

  • I was in the same place last Sept. with my 4 yr old. We got help through a child Phychologist who said ODD and ADHD , with trial and error we found a great med. We are in a much happier place now. GL

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:45 PM on Jul. 28, 2009

  • Good luck. Sounds like my oldest daughter. Although, she wasn't that aggressive at 5. She's 9 now and her younger brother who is almost 7 and is 3" taller and outweighs her by 20lbs and he's terrified of her because she gets so violent. She has thrown heavy objects at him and one day got mad and dropped a heavy, remote controlled toy onto his head and gave him a concussion. She threw her sister's CD player across the room because I told her to pick up. It's insane. Her regular pediatrician just blew us off as if we were exaggerating. It's insane to live with. We're looking for a therapist or behavior specialist to take her to because I can't control her and she's getting more and more defiant with her teachers and other adults (refusing to do homework and ignoring them). We think she has ODD. She fits all the descriptions.

    Answer by justanotherjen at 7:46 PM on Jul. 28, 2009

  • You may have to go to more/different doctors to finally find an answer. Ya know second third opinions and all of that.
    If an answer cannot be found and he behaves like that in Pre-k he might get kicked out. I would also see if you can get an appointment with the school psychologist

    Answer by justgrape723 at 8:36 AM on Jul. 29, 2009