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How do I get an 8 year old to sleep in her own bed? I can't take the crying every time I try.

Ten days after my daughter was born, my mom died of lung cancer. I had waited a really long time for my daughter and was scared something would happen to her, so I put her in bed with me. Now I don't know how to get her in her own bed. I have her bedroom set up real nice and I've been trying to sleep on the couch to be closer to her, but it is not working. She just cries because she is used to being with me. I love having her with me, but I know she needs to go to her own bed. What do I do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:18 PM on Jul. 29, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (7)
  • Have you put her in her bed and slept beside her or on the floor then tried sneaking off when she was asleep? My mom did that when she was trying to get us to sleep in our own beds.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:22 PM on Jul. 29, 2009

  • A good friends of mine had to wean her child out of her room by order of our local CPS.When she argued with them about how to do it they suggested that she get a toddler bed and set it up beside her bed for one week let him fall asleep in her bed and move him down.The next week put him only in his bed beside hers.the next week move the bed to the hall.Then next into his own room.She tried this and it worked pretty well for him.The only thing was she let him fall asleep in her bed every night and moved him half awake to his bed where ever it was that night for a while.she got walkie-Talkies to use so he could call her if he needed her once he was going to sleep in his own bed.This was a different case for her and her son though she had to move him out quickly and him being PDD-NOS made it all the harder.I really like the above posters idea to. you'll have to see what works for you and your DD.There is always bribery? :0)


    Answer by But_Mommie at 6:58 PM on Jul. 29, 2009

  • My older two went through this stage and we put them in the hallway with their pillows, blankets or sleeping bags and left our bedroom door open. Every couple of nights, we would move them closer to their rooms and eventually they were OK with sleeping in their own beds in their own rooms. But I'm thinking your daughter may be too old to try this. Sorry if this doesn't help you any.

    Answer by LovingParent08 at 7:47 PM on Jul. 29, 2009

  • but mommie... how wack why would CPS care. UGH!!!

    Okay, this is what i've done. I learned it on super nanny. I started out RIGHT NEXT to their bed. Until they falled asleep and stay near by.
    Slowly I start making my way a little further. Night by night. Until they are finally laying down by themselves (It takes A WHILE)
    There will be some crying, but you can answer I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere etc.

    When they come to my bed (if I realize it) I take them back. When they manage the whole night (I give LOTS of praise and sometimes a reward in the AM)

    Kids crying about stuff is part of being a parent and we can't just give in every time or we'll be raising not so cool adults (to put it nicely). HOWEVER, there's no reason not to try to make the transition as easy as possible.

    Oh, and a night light and/or special stuffed animal SHE picks are not bad either. GOOD LUCK and HUGS, be strong momma.

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 12:02 AM on Jul. 30, 2009

  • Well here's a solution we used- not for getting kids to sleep in their rooms, but for staying in bed. I believe it was from Family Fun.

    Every night before bed, we placed 3 quarters outside their doors. If they got one chance to get up before we took a quarter away- you know- the last minute potty call. The next time we "heard" them or they came out, we took one quarter away.

    This seemed to really work for them because then they earned money for behaving. Eventually we went to using dimes and nickels too and it still worked the same. You could even do a nickel, dime, and quarter at once too.

    I was amazed at how well it worked and now we don't even use anything.

    Answer by gigs5liz at 8:56 AM on Jul. 30, 2009

  • My daughter always started off in her bed, but would sneak in mine in the middle of the night. Every night. Until I couldnt take it anymore.
    I brought my daughter to the store and had her pick out her own nightlight. I let her pile her bed with all the stuffed animals she wanted so she would feel "protected" (as she would say) At first she would still come in my room, but I would just take her back to hers. The first couple nights she cried, but you cant give in. Just keep re assuring her that she will be alright and youre right down the hall (no matter how many times you have to put her back dont give in!) Pretty soon she will realize that she WILL be ok and you will feel like a million bucks having the extra room in your bed!

    Answer by KallysMommy at 10:51 PM on Jul. 31, 2009

  • I have the same problem. When I tell her she cant be in my bed, she gets upset and thinks that I just dont want or like her with me, and she says she feels so comfy and loves being with me. I end up feeling bad and letting her. When I finally get in bed she's fast asleep and all cozy and peaceful. Much diffrent than when shes in her bed and waking up all night!

    Answer by ginaloves3 at 10:23 AM on Aug. 25, 2009

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