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I don't know what to do.

I just had a baby in February, and I'm pregnant again. My baby is only 5 months old and I'm 6 weeks pregnant again. My husband would not let me get on birth control and now I'm in a situation that I am not ready to be in. I'm already exhausted and on the verge of losing my mind from being pregnant and not sleeping because I'm up all night and day with my child. I'm not ready for this and I don't know what to do. My husband even said that he wasn't going to get up at night to help when the next baby is born (due a month after my child turns 1 year). I've been really upset and crying because I just lost 60 lbs after I had my baby, and now I'm going to gain all that weight back, not to mention I was never ok with being pregnant in the first place... my mother lives 500 miles away from me and his mother makes it impossible for either of his other to to respect authority. I can't do this on my own, and idk what to do...

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:18 PM on Jul. 30, 2009 in Health

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • If your husband is not willing to help you when it is his child too, then you need to seriously think about leaving that situation. Would you be able to take your little one and move to where your mom lives? Maybe move in with her til after the baby is born? then you may have a little help at night, and you would be able to work during the day to help your mom pay bills and pay her rent. And if you decide to stay with your hubby and he still says no birth control after the birth of this one, then I would tell him no birth control, no sex. You can do it, I know its frustrating. My 2 oldest are 20 months apart. I actually found it EASIER having them close together because once you are done with diapers, you know you aren't going to have to buy them any more lol. Once they are both on milk, no more formula. And being close in age, they could play really well together like mine did. It will be ok.
    AprilDJC

    Answer by AprilDJC at 3:24 PM on Jul. 30, 2009

  • Well, there is not much you can do about it now. My brother and I were exactly 12 mos. apart. I know it sound awful and that you feel as though you cannot handle it now, but it will all work out. There are many people out there who are in this type of situation. You just deal with it, life goes on... The baby is coming no matter what.

    As far as the weight goes, that is the least of your concerns right now. If you were not okay with being pregnant, maybe you should not have had sex... just a thought...

    Suck it up and go on with your life. Maybe think about getting your tubes tied after the baby gets here.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:23 PM on Jul. 30, 2009

  • I am so sorry... I think there is so many issues going on here, that I don't know what one to address first.

    I think your best option is to get out of the relationship
    say_tay

    Answer by say_tay at 3:24 PM on Jul. 30, 2009

  • I'm fucking 19, they wont tie my tubes. And maybe I'm not looking for someone to tell me what not to do, I asked for someone to tell me what to do now that I'm in shitty situation that I don't want to fucking be in. If I wanted my mother's advice, I would have fucking called her!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:25 PM on Jul. 30, 2009

  • That message was to the first idiot who replied
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:26 PM on Jul. 30, 2009

  • Dont ask for advice and then bitch and moan when people give it to you.
    No one here is going to pet you.

    Your hubby sounds like a controlling douche, you need to put your foot down, either in his ass or out the door.
    Cherrie522

    Answer by Cherrie522 at 3:44 PM on Jul. 30, 2009

  • Take your baby and go live with your mother. This man does not deserve any of you.

    Keep this handy, I suspect that you may need it: The National Domestic Violence Hotline: 800-799-SAFE (7233)
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 5:54 PM on Jul. 30, 2009

  • "Your hubby sounds like a controlling douche, you need to put your foot down, either in his ass or out the door"


    And


    "Take your baby and go live with your mother. This man does not deserve any of you.

    Keep this handy, I suspect that you may need it: The National Domestic Violence Hotline: 800-799-SAFE (7233)"


    Both of these pretty much sum it all up!!!


    He wouldn't let you go on BC... your body, your choice... he can go  f*%k his fist!!!!  

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:28 PM on Jul. 30, 2009

  • Been there, done that and I was 19. I really relate to your situation.


    No man should be telling you when you can and can not take birth control. Babies should be a mutual decision. No relationship built on control, coercion, and emotional manipulation can survive. Partners are supposed to want to see one another happy and fulfilled not controlled and emotionally exhausted.  Deep down, I believe that you already know the answer to your own question. You must find the strength to leave this man. He is dead weight. Imagine how free you would feel without him. Imagine this relationship in 10 years in 20 years. Does what you see satisfy you?


    Once you do this, consider adoption for this second baby if he or she is really too much for you. Every child deserves to be wanted and loved. If you ever want to talk about it more, feel free to message me.

    pixie_stix

    Answer by pixie_stix at 1:51 AM on Jul. 31, 2009

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