The property distributions are different in each state if hes filling first he can walk all over you and take everything from you. You need to get a lawyer and have family support and friends and if you both don't really want a divorce try counseling good luck I am very sorry to hear this.
First off I am so sorry. It depends on where you live. Get a lawyer. Some give free consultations. Turn to reliable family members for support. Don't let him walk all over you. After 23 years you have a lot of rights. If you have kids in college or at home that will play into it also.